Rally in israel: to support Sudanese refugees A while back we told you about the plight of Sudanese refugees who had arrived in Israel via Egypt. They were jailed, stuck on army bases, or placed under house arrest on kibbutzim while the Israeli government tried to find other countries to send them to in coordination with the United Nations High Commission for Refugees. Sudan is considered an enemy country, so Sudanese refugees aren’t eligible for asylum in Israel.

Thanks in large part to intense lobbying by NGOs, Knesset members, and people like Elie Wiesel and Aliza Olmert--the prime minister's wife--these refugees are now newly free, and are official residents of the Jewish state: More than 600 Sudanese refugees from Darfur have been granted temporary residency in Israel. Israel also gave work permits to about 2,000 refugees from Eritrea whose lives would be endangered if sent home.

Tempering this happy news is the report that Prime Minister Ehud Olmert has directed authorities to expel 4,500 Africans, including people from Ivory Coast, Ghana and Nigeria, by the end of the week. Olmert's office declined to discuss the expulsion order, but it’s going to be difficult to locate the immigrants, who are likely scattered around the country, and even more difficult to figure out where to send them. Human rights groups are afraid that if sent back to a Muslim country, they will be persecuted for spending time in a Jewish state.

Related: Sudanese Refugees in Israel

Gramoz Prestreshi, left, was accepted as a legal refugee in the United States, and Korab Zuka awaits an asylum hearing. Both were abused in Kosovo for being homosexual. The Washington Post reports today on persecuted gay refugees.

WE GET LAID BECAUSE OF ‘MUNICH’

THE NEWS:
“Knocked Up” gives off-handed discussion of Jewish power. [The Jewish Telegraph Agency]

THE CHATTER:
“This film is every man’s wet dream.” (i.e. the fat dude with the Jewfro gets in Katherine Heigl’s pants.) [Rotten Tomatoes]
Director Judd Apatow of "40-Year-Old Virgin" and "Freaks and Geeks" won’t settle for just a superficial laugher. [Rolling Stone]
Eric Bana kicked ass as Mossad agent in "Munich," but too bad Spielberg butchered history and Tony Kushner made up Golda Meir quotes. [National Review Online]

OK, WE ALSO GET LAID BECAUSE OF ZIONISM

THE NEWS:
This year, some 300 Jewish New Yorkers, most in their 30’s, are making aliya to Israel. Wanna guess how many are single and lonely? [NYC Jewish News]

THE CHATTER:
Birthright perversions can wait – they may be sharing their new neighborhoods with Sudanese refugees. [Power Line Blog]
Don’t worry about finding work in Tel Aviv, you can just go shopping and they’ll pay you. [expatriates.com]

NAZISM, COMMUNISM, BABS

THE NEWS:
Streisand settles for less than a mil, plays first ever concert in Germany. [The Jewish Telegraph Agency]

THE CHATTER:
Rumor had it that Babs wouldn’t play in Germany because of the Holocaust. [Reuters]
Forget WWII, the singer said she hated her birthplace, Brooklyn. Now that’s unholy. [Ticket4-You.com]

JEWS IN THE HOOD

THE NEWS:
Infamous Jewish blogger, “Bagel in Harlem,” leaves the ghetto, and she hasn’t been heard from since January. [Big Shirtless Rob]

THE CHATTER:
One woman’s love affair with a storied NYC neighborhood. That is, until some homeless dude whacked her over the head with a bag of cans. [Bagel in Harlem]
Where Jews go, Asian cuisine follows: new sushi spot in Harlem. [Harlem Fur]

PENISES TO THE LEFT, VAGINAS TO THE RIGHT

THE NEWS:
Jewish independent school in Sweden segregates the sexes. [SperoNews]

THE CHATTER:
But what if same-sex learning makes them better at chess? [The Federation of Jewish Communities]
If the men and women don’t mix, and they wear black polyester in the winter, are Hasids really all that different from the denizens of ummah? [Gates of Vienna]

THIS IS WHY ISAIAH BERLIN DIED A VIRGIN

THE NEWS:
The perfect posh kosher wedding for only £100 per minute. [The Jewish Chronicle]

THE CHATTER:
Please, don’t get the M&M’s with his and her names. Actually, don’t even get married in the UK. You could have your fairytale wedding in Texas for the subscription price of London Weddings magazine. Plus in Texas you smash a beer can instead of a champagne glass. [London Weddings]
Ladies, don’t forget the modestly high neckline and long sleeves. [WeddingGuideUK.com]

MORE BOYCOTT BOLLOCKS

THE NEWS:
Eric McDonald, the Transport and General Workers Union’s Birmingham branch secretary, who encourages boycott of Israeli goods, says, “Israel is very intolerant and sometimes its behavior is not dissimilar to that of the Nazis.” [The Jewish Chronicle]

THE CHATTER:
TGWU writes letter to Blair regarding last summer’s war in Lebanon. [T&G]
Is it hypocritical if the lads down at TGWU love falafel?

5,000 YEARS OF HOT LOVIN’

THE NEWS:
Jews are great in bed because of guilt. [thisisby.us]

THE CHATTER:
If only the hole in the sheet business were true... [Judaism 101]
You might as well get that bullseye tattoo on your lower back since Jewish cemeteries still debate the penalty for body desecration. [The Boston Globe]

This is admirable, though insufficient. The United States has a moral responsibility to accept as many refugees from Iraq as choose to emigrate here.

Karen Koning AbuZayd, commissioner general of the U.N. Relief and Works Agency for Palestine Refugees, said Thursday no specific country has offered to receive Palestinian refugees in Iraq, "but I know the United States confirmed it can take 7,000 of them."

She told United Press International in Damascus that while there were no plans to permanently settle Palestinian refugees, "some live in difficult conditions, especially those from Iraq and who are stranded on the Iraqi borders" with Syria and with Jordan. The UNRWA chief noted her agency and the U.N. high commissioner for refugees have requested third countries to grant refuge to Palestinians from Iraq.

Interesting, that 7,000 figure. According to the State Department,

Assistant Secretary of State for Population, Refugees and Migration Ellen Sauerbrey told reporters at a Washington briefing March 23 that previous reports about the United States accepting an additional 7,000 Iraqi refugees in the coming months are inaccurate.  She said this figure simply reflects the number of U.S. referrals the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR) feels it realistically can expect to make in the coming months.

“UNHCR, which has the international mandate, if you will, to do the protection and make referrals for resettlement has indicated … that they had the capacity to be able to register, identify the vulnerabilities and make referrals of about 20,000, and that they anticipated that they would refer 7,000 to the U.S. resettlement program,” she said.

Does mean that the UN is only concerned with Palestinians fleeing Iraq? Not that Palestinians don't deserve safe haven, but what about native-born Iraqis? 

Or is the figure just a coincidence?

You probably already know all about those Ethiopians that Israel airlifted in in 1984 and 1991. Called Beta Israel or Falashas, they were Jews living in Ethiopia, isolated from the rest of world Jewry who had a vague knowledge of their existence, but little interest in them. In 1975 Israel officially recognized them as Jews, and in 1984, Operation Moses began, transporting them to Israel from Sudan, where many had fled due to persecution and widespread famine. Operation Solomon followed in 1991. Today there are over 100,000 Ethiopian Jews in Israel, and if I had a nickel for every time I heard a Zionist lecturer talk about how Israel is the only country to ever airlift Africans out of Africa in a time of famine I would be able to pay off all my student loans.
Sudanese Refugees in Israel: Are screwed
I am all about the Ethiopian community in Israel (I’m particularly in favor of the Ethiopian Hebrew U security guard named Shlomo marrying me and making many babies with me. Yum.), and I think it’s great that Israel got them out of a famine stricken country, but if that’s really a top priority of the country, shouldn’t Israel be somewhat more tolerant of Sudanese refugees who’ve escaped into Israel?

There are only a handful of refugees from Darfur who have managed to get into Israel (by way of Egypt), but they’ve been jailed, or stuck on army bases. Some have been placed under house arrest on kibbutzim while the Israeli government tries to find countries where they can send them in coordination with the United Nations High Commission for Refugees. Why can’t they stay in Israel? Sudan is considered an enemy country, so Sudanese refugees aren’t eligible for asylum in the Holy Land.

I read stuff like this and I want to break something. I can see why Israel might not have the wherewithal to send troops to Darfur, what with Lebanon and the PA still major concerns, but there’s no excuse for not allowing refugees who’ve walked hundreds of miles and escaped one of the greatest atrocities of our time to at least hang out somewhere without being arrested and severely restricted.

Not standing by idly while your brother’s blood is spilled is a major tenet of Jewish law, and it’s great to know that Jewish causes have been at the forefront of activism in favor intervention in Darfur, but this complete lack of compassion for victims in Israel makes me crazy.

I have no practical advice today. Just serious despair.