Getting kosher food in prison has been a pain in the ass for a while now. There’s the child-molester who wanted a yarmulke and some matzah ball soup in Georgia, and the former Neo-Nazi and statutory rapist in Missouri who was jonesin’ for some kugel. The obvious take home message here is that if you can’t do time in a facility that won’t provide you with kosher food, then you really shouldn’t do the crime. That said, both the child-molester and the statutory rapist won lawsuits suing for kosher food in prison. And in California, after a different child-molester took the state to court for not providing him with kosher meals in 2003, the state promised to make good faith efforts to get kosher food available to all California inmates by 2006.
Kosher Prison Food: yummier than Halal?
This article in the Forward explains some of the unexpected results of what’s called the Jewish Kosher Diet Plan.

As a direct result of the lawsuit, the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation has been scrambling in recent years, in conjunction with the Northern and Southern California boards of rabbis, to install a Jewish chaplain at every prison in order to oversee the preparation of kosher food.

…

The work extends far beyond merely vetting jailhouse kosher cuisine. According to one longtime Jewish chaplain, his niche is as close as a rabbi can come to performing missionary work.

“We work with the underbelly of society, the spiritually void, the morally empty,” said Rabbi Lon Moskowitz, the Jewish chaplain at California Men’s Colony in San Luis Obispo. “It’s important to have chaplains so we can facilitate the Jewish Kosher Diet Plan statewide, but it’s a requirement so that the spiritual needs of incarcerated Jews are met.”

That’s all well and good, but to meet someone’s spiritual needs you need to get him to walk in the door, and it’s the kosher meat, more often than not, that does that job:

When the kosher diet plan was first introduced two years ago, [Rabbi Mendel] Slavin said, non-Jewish inmates began attending his services and claiming to be Jewish in order to get on the meal plan. “With the kosher diet, it became fashionable to be Jewish,” he said. He had worked to explain to the non-Jews that eating kosher was not a privilege, but rather a requirement for those who truly were observant Jews.

 

Isn’t it funny that kosher food is getting prisoners to explore their spiritual lives, and at the same time kosher food is getting a lot of Hasidic rabbis and businessmen in trouble as their shady meatpacking plant is turned inside out?

Kosher prison food: like kosher plane food, but worse? A former neo-Nazi in Missouri has won a case requesting kosher food in prison. Prison officials don't want to deal with the cost or hassle (kosher food is twice as expensive and might cause pushing and shoving in the meal lines, apparently), and doubt exactly how serious Norman Lee Toler—serving a 10-year sentence for statutory rape—really is about his Judaism. On the one hand he has several white supremacist tattoos, including one that says SS, and has been caught with pictures of Hitler and white supremacist pamphlets in the past. On the other hand, he's said to regularly read Torah and maintain contact with rabbis, and he has a reputation among the inmates for being Jewish. For now, Toler has to make do with treyf food, but the prison is under court order to look into its options.

Other neo-Nazis and white supremacists turned (friend of the) Jews who have made recent news include Pinchads Zlotosvksky and Tim Zaal.

Related: We commented on a similar case in Georgia last year, but in that instance it wasn’t a neo-Nazi requesting kosher food—it was a child molester/murderer.

Very Nice, Very Nice: how much? Borat is going to have to add one more point of interest to his travel guide to Kazakhstan: The country's first ever kosher restaurant. That’s right, a new kosher restaurant has made its debut as part of Kazakhstan’s grand “Seriously, we’re not anti-Semites!” campaign, generated in response to the (apparently false) contrary evidence provided by the Borat movie. Says Ran Ichay, Israeli ambassador to Kazakhstan, “This is the one place in the world where there is no anti-Semitism. It’s not only because of official government policy but also thanks to the natural openness of the people. And this is where Sacha Baron Cohen chose to set Borat! This is the most tolerant country I have ever seen.”

The restaurant’s grand opening was attended by top Kazakh diplomats and Israeli foreign ministers, surely providing a plethora of handshakes and feel-good photo-ops. It just goes to prove: nothing can bring cultures together like a nice pastrami on rye.

Related: Kosher GPS, China Jumps on Kosher Bandwagon, Ultra-Kosher Energy Drink for the Ultra-Orthodox Rock Star, Kosher Vending Machines

Why is that Americans come over all queasy when discussing the glory that is haggis? After all, despite the most famous living Scotsman, Groundskeeper Willie, exhorting America’s youth to sample its delights ("Get yer haggis, right here! Chopped heart and lungs boiled in a wee sheep's stomach! Tastes as good as it sounds. Good for what ails ya!") it seems that popular prejudice against thGroundskeeper Willie: big fan of haggis, not so much Leviticus 11e “great Chieftain o’the puddin-race” is alive and well Stateside. Did I say prejudice? Call it discrimination: Scottish haggis is, outrageously, banned from the US on account of those delicious wee bits of lung and some nonsense about mad cows. So no haggis lasagne or haggis nachos for you guys, unfortunately, unless you make it yourself.

Of course, there’s another problem with haggis: It’s not terribly kosher. Leviticus 11 specifically names the haggis as – okay, that’s not quite true. Actually, even if you do keep strict kosher, most of the ingredients in the traditional haggis recipe are not inherently trayf – after all, I’m told it’s very similar to kishka - and if you journey to Scotland it’s not that difficult to find kosher haggis. Unsurprisingly, though, there’s not a big market in the US for properly kashered sheep’s stomach, let alone the regular variety, so you'd be forgiven for thinking that you may never sample the delights of this majestic dish.

But as we approach January 25^th, the annual night dedicated to Scotland’s national poet Rabbie Burns (who penned a famous ode to the national dish), I figure: Why should Rabbi Burns miss out? Here, then, is a recipe for kosher haggis - or haggisim, if you will. Go on, try it!

Ingredients:
1 clootie (means a little cloth). A clean linen dish towel will do.
2 lb. dry oatmeal
1 lb. chopped mutton fat, rendered, or suet, which is the cleanest fat on the animal's body.
1 to 1 1/2 lb. lamb or venison liver, boiled and minced
Small quantity stock (lamb by preference)
1 large chopped onion
1/2 tsp. cayenne pepper
1/2 tsp. allspice
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. pepper
2 tbsps soy sauce or suitable substitute

Instructions:
Toast oatmeal slowly until golden brown.
Mix all ingredients (except clootie) together; add stock until soft.
Fill clootie to just over half full, press out air, sew up securely with needle and thread.
Have ready a large pot of boiling water.
Boil slowly for 4 to 5 hours, ensuring haggis remains covered with water.
Serve with “bashed neeps” (swede) and “tatties” (potato).

And, of course, a good Scotch Whiskey.

[Recipe from the Capital Scot]

I went to my first Orthodox bar mitzvah last weekend. It was my first Orthodox anything, come to think of it. While I didn’t pay much attention in temple (since the women and men sit separately and I didn’t have Fiance--a more religious Jew than I--beside me to explain what was going on), I paid great attention to the food.

I seldom keep Kosher, so I didn't have high hopes for the Kosher meal ahead. But as it turns out, Kosher food isn’t so bad! Everything served was actually pretty good. Especially the desserts, which I’ll get to in a later post.

Friday night was Shabbat (or Shabbos) dinner, and we started with pea soup. When it arrived, I gingerly dipped into the slimy green substance and braced myself for the worst. I was confused and pleasantly surprised when it tasted delicious. Quite possibly the best pea soup I’ve ever had, smooth and spiked with chives and mint. Fiance and I looked at each other to confirm: “There’s definitely cream in this.” Since Kosher laws restrict serving meat and milk in the same meal, we anticipated a main course of fish.

You can imagine my surprise when, after a yummy, thoughtfully arranged iceberg lettuce salad garnished with pecans and cranberries, this stuffed chicken breast came out as the main course:

Kosher stuffed Chicken

Fiance and I raised our eyebrows at each other and I immediately sought out the chef to ask what was in the pea soup. Non-dairy creamer, he told me. Genius! This trick will certainly come in handy when my Kosher conscience nags around the holidays or a more pious mood strikes Fiance around dinnertime. Non-dairy creamer just may change my life.

Even better? This recipe couldn't be easier.

You know when you go to a Shabbat dinner and the conversation is awesome, but the food sucks and the wine is awful? It’s so disappointing, and I’d definitely argue that it detracts from the experience of Shabbat. There are tons of resources for kosher food and Shabbat meals online, but I just wanted to share a quick guide to some of my new favorites:

First of all, I hope The Jew and the Carrot is already part of your daily blog routine, because they’ve got all kinds of awesome contributors, and useful posts like this list of Kosher Organic Wines, and this post on how to host a sustainable Kiddush at your shul. They’ve got a recent post on kosher grilling which you should definitely check out now that it’s summertime and the charcoal is cheap.
Shabbat dinner: Should be yummy!
Speaking of grilling, I hope you’re all gearing up for the Kroger Kosher BBQ Festival and Contest held every year in Memphis, Tennessee. This year it will be October 21st, and I’ll be making the trek from Nashville. You can find out more info about past years’ contests and how to enter your shul here. Or check out a review of last years’ entries over at the BBQ blog.

More often than not the contribution I’m asked to bring to Shabbat dinners is wine, and I’ve got a few standards. The Teal Lake Shiraz, or the Bartenura Moscato. But this week I stopped by a wine store on the Upper West Side and was steered towards a bottle from the Yogev winery in Binyamina by a very helpful (and cute) sommelier who asked me out as I waiting in line with my bottle. Haven’t decided if I’ll take him up on the offer yet, but the wine was excellent, and after Shabbat when I checked it out online I found that kosherwineguy.com liked it, too. Next time I’m looking for wine I’ll definitely stop by kosherwineguy before I visit my attractive sommelier.

For recipes, I’ve recently become a fan of RecipeZaar’s kosher section. They have weird things like a lime almond cheesecake, but I’ve made anything bad or unsuccessful form them, so definitely worth a click.

Don’t forget to say a bracha…