Jewish Orthodox Feminists: do exist!Orthodoxy is an easy target when we’re criticizing societies where women are treated poorly, given fewer rights, and are relegated to lives in the kitchen and nursery. Walking into an Orthodox synagogue and seeing a mechitza dividing the men and women can seem like a throwback to the days of Jim Crow, and when we hear about ultra-Orthodox women wearing burka-like garments, it’s hard not to jump to conclusions about the kind of society that would endorse such behaviors.

The truth is much more complicated. Though it has taken Orthodoxy a staggeringly long time to come to terms with even the most basic feminist ideals, all kinds of feminism are alive and well in the Orthodox world.

• The Jewish Orthodox Feminist Alliance provides lists of minyans where women participate in various forms, directions for life cycle events, advocates for agunot (women whose husbands won’t grant them Jewish divorces), and access to articles and databases to address a wide range of issues, from whether first-born women should fast the day before Pesach, to alternative readings of traditional texts.

• Education for Orthodox Jewish girls has come a long way: Until fairly recently there were some communities where women were not even allowed to learn Torah directly from a book, but in the past fifty years, education for Jewish girls has taken great strides, and schools like the Drisha Institute and Midreshet Lindenbaum allow women to study Talmud and pursue Torah learning with the same vigor as at the best yeshivot for men.

• Scholars like Tamar Ross and Haviva Ner-David are writing books that break open the stereotypes cast on Orthodoxy and feminism. There’s still plenty of apologist bullshit going on—you can always find some rabbi who wants to explain that women aren’t allowed to do x because they’re already on a higher spiritual plane, so it’s just not necessary—but increasingly, women are breaking out of the shtetl mold and finding new paths and ways to compromise tradition and modernity.
  

Golda Meir: not a champion for women's rights Meanwhile, the secular Israeli world isn’t quite as gender egalitarian as we like to think. We tend to regard kibbutzim as a kind of precursor to feminism, with women out in the fields working alongside men, and we love to brag about things like Israeli women spending time in the army, Golda Meir having been the first women Prime Minister of Israel decades before a female President was considered possible in the US, and Women’s rights always being a cornerstone of Israeli politics. In fact, according to an article at MyJewishLearning, even on socialist kibbutzim, women generally ended up back in stereotypical roles, working in kitchens and childcare because they were seen as too weak for heavy agricultural labor.

• Though Golda Meir was a political lioness, she was not known for working on behalf of women’s rights, and few women have been able to follow in her footsteps to rise to the top of Israeli political parties.

• The number of women in the Knesset is still very low relative to female political representation in other Western countries.

• Israeli cultural capitol still nudges women back into the home and towards traditional child-rearing roles, though slow improvements are being made.

• Women in the Israeli army complain of sexual harassment, and of being given unimportant jobs where they languish for their two years of service.

Despite these sobering facts, there is some good news: The President of the Israeli Supreme Court is a woman, and women are well-represented and protected in Israeli legislation. There’s still plenty of work to be done on both ends of the spectrum, and it’s not always as clear cut as you might think.

Previously: Haman Wore a Three-Cornered Hat?

WE GET LAID BECAUSE OF ‘MUNICH’

THE NEWS:
“Knocked Up” gives off-handed discussion of Jewish power. [The Jewish Telegraph Agency]

THE CHATTER:
“This film is every man’s wet dream.” (i.e. the fat dude with the Jewfro gets in Katherine Heigl’s pants.) [Rotten Tomatoes]
Director Judd Apatow of "40-Year-Old Virgin" and "Freaks and Geeks" won’t settle for just a superficial laugher. [Rolling Stone]
Eric Bana kicked ass as Mossad agent in "Munich," but too bad Spielberg butchered history and Tony Kushner made up Golda Meir quotes. [National Review Online]

OK, WE ALSO GET LAID BECAUSE OF ZIONISM

THE NEWS:
This year, some 300 Jewish New Yorkers, most in their 30’s, are making aliya to Israel. Wanna guess how many are single and lonely? [NYC Jewish News]

THE CHATTER:
Birthright perversions can wait – they may be sharing their new neighborhoods with Sudanese refugees. [Power Line Blog]
Don’t worry about finding work in Tel Aviv, you can just go shopping and they’ll pay you. [expatriates.com]

NAZISM, COMMUNISM, BABS

THE NEWS:
Streisand settles for less than a mil, plays first ever concert in Germany. [The Jewish Telegraph Agency]

THE CHATTER:
Rumor had it that Babs wouldn’t play in Germany because of the Holocaust. [Reuters]
Forget WWII, the singer said she hated her birthplace, Brooklyn. Now that’s unholy. [Ticket4-You.com]

JEWS IN THE HOOD

THE NEWS:
Infamous Jewish blogger, “Bagel in Harlem,” leaves the ghetto, and she hasn’t been heard from since January. [Big Shirtless Rob]

THE CHATTER:
One woman’s love affair with a storied NYC neighborhood. That is, until some homeless dude whacked her over the head with a bag of cans. [Bagel in Harlem]
Where Jews go, Asian cuisine follows: new sushi spot in Harlem. [Harlem Fur]

PENISES TO THE LEFT, VAGINAS TO THE RIGHT

THE NEWS:
Jewish independent school in Sweden segregates the sexes. [SperoNews]

THE CHATTER:
But what if same-sex learning makes them better at chess? [The Federation of Jewish Communities]
If the men and women don’t mix, and they wear black polyester in the winter, are Hasids really all that different from the denizens of ummah? [Gates of Vienna]

THIS IS WHY ISAIAH BERLIN DIED A VIRGIN

THE NEWS:
The perfect posh kosher wedding for only £100 per minute. [The Jewish Chronicle]

THE CHATTER:
Please, don’t get the M&M’s with his and her names. Actually, don’t even get married in the UK. You could have your fairytale wedding in Texas for the subscription price of London Weddings magazine. Plus in Texas you smash a beer can instead of a champagne glass. [London Weddings]
Ladies, don’t forget the modestly high neckline and long sleeves. [WeddingGuideUK.com]

MORE BOYCOTT BOLLOCKS

THE NEWS:
Eric McDonald, the Transport and General Workers Union’s Birmingham branch secretary, who encourages boycott of Israeli goods, says, “Israel is very intolerant and sometimes its behavior is not dissimilar to that of the Nazis.” [The Jewish Chronicle]

THE CHATTER:
TGWU writes letter to Blair regarding last summer’s war in Lebanon. [T&G]
Is it hypocritical if the lads down at TGWU love falafel?

5,000 YEARS OF HOT LOVIN’

THE NEWS:
Jews are great in bed because of guilt. [thisisby.us]

THE CHATTER:
If only the hole in the sheet business were true... [Judaism 101]
You might as well get that bullseye tattoo on your lower back since Jewish cemeteries still debate the penalty for body desecration. [The Boston Globe]

Bethany E.: Iron Lady of WineMeet: Bethany E.

About Bethany E.: "I am always ready to wrestle. My nose whistles when I breathe. I am in touch with my inner jap and sometimes respond to the name 'Golda.' I have freakishly strong hands. I believe in rescuing animals, not people."

Currently Watching: I am a TV whore which is probably a good thing considering I work for the largest film &; entertainment company in the world....

Age, Status: 30, single

Oh Bethany, you bring my dreams of a Jewcy MySpace equivalent closer to fruition. If Lindsey Lohan could see your profile from rehab, she’d be envious--and proud. You've brought a touch of class to us party girls, peppering your "About" section with wit; random wit albeit, but wit nonetheless. You're likely a feisty sex fiend--"always ready to wrestle"--but lest I take that thought too far, you've mentioned a decidedly unsexy whistling nose. Love the ambiguity.

I'd speculate you're also slightly loopy--or not "sober"--more often than deemed socially acceptable if you only sometimes respond to the name "Golda". When, pray tell, might that be? As cohorts try to pry that glass of wine from your "freakishly strong hands"? Perhaps it refers to Golda Meir--the Iron Lady of Israeli politics? In the spirit of random "wit," a play in half an act:

Bethany E.: Last glass of wine is mine, all mine! What time is it?

Cohort 1: Nine o'clock.

Bethany E.: Shit! Quick, get to the wine shop before it's too late! And J. Lo's new dance show is on! Put on MTV NOW!

Cohort 1: Uh, ok, Golda. I came here to escape the dangers in the streets, not to be your, like, slave. And since when do you run out of wine?

Enter Cohort 2

Cohort 2: Yo, Cohort 1, hows it goin'? Hey Bethany E. Bethany E.?

Bethany E.: [silence; nose whistles]

Cohort 2: Er--Golda?

Golda: What’s up. All my bitches in da house! Whoo!

Cohort 2: Got anything to drink?

Golda: For moi [nose whistles], the Iron Lady of Wine and the cat, yes.

Cohort 2: Umm. I'll go out and try to grab something?

Cohort 1: But there's a riot in the streets, you won't be safe!

Golda: Shut. Up! They're having an "On the Six" dance off! [nose whistles] And I've slept with all of them!!

Cohort 2: A riot?

Cohort 1: Apparently, all the Comcast subscribers who are unable to Jewce have banded together and are about to storm Comcast HQ.

Golda: But it's on the next block--you'll be fine. [nose whistles] The Iron Lady of Wine will lead you quickly at a commercial break. Unless they show that funny "Rock the Cazbah/Rock the Catbox" commercial--then you're on your own.

Cohort 2: Ok. Let's bring a bulldog for safety.

Golda: You're in luck--I adopted one just this afternoon! You'll never guess how it happened! I turned around as I was leaving Tiffany's, to check out the reflection of my ass in my new Juicy Couture gold velour sweatsuit, and I noticed a cute puppy crossing the street. I turned back, pausing once again to make sure my lip gloss was still sparkling, and noticed a meteor about to fall on the cute poochey. Faster than I can buy Dior sunglasses I sprinted to the pup. I kicked aside the man who appeared tethered to my new baby by a leather rope grabbed the little thing and found safety in Bergdorf's.

Cohort 2: I think I'm going to need a sip of your--

Golda: Sic 'em, pookie!