Religion & Beliefs

Words or Turds: Mike Huckabee On Gay Marriage, Fried Squirrels

Welcome to the first installment of Words or Turds, where each week, we'll bring you a money quote on God, faith, religion, or any number of other shadowy concepts. It's up to you to decide and explain whether they're words … Read More

By / January 18, 2008

Welcome to the first installment of Words or Turds, where each week, we'll bring you a money quote on God, faith, religion, or any number of other shadowy concepts. It's up to you to decide and explain whether they're words or turds. This week, because he's just got so much to say, here are two gems from from Republican wannabe-president Mike Huckabee:

Huckabee on the problems of the Constitution, as it relates to and deals with issues of abortion and gay marriage:

"I believe it's a lot easier to change the Constitution than it would be to change the word of the living God. And that's what we need to do, is to amend the Constitution so it's in God's standards, rather than try to change God's standards."

Huckabee on why he feels so at home in South Carolina:

“South Carolina’s a great place for me. I know how to eat grits. I speak the language. We even know how to talk about eating fried squirrel. We’re on the same wavelength. I bet you never did this: When I was in college, we used to take a popcorn popper, because that was the only thing they’d let us use in the dorms, and we would fry squirrel in a popcorn popper in our dorm rooms.”

Possible Tuesday Taste Test recipe? Perhaps! But for now, we're more interested to know whether you think Huckabee is a man of words or turds. This one's a real head-scratcher, right?

  • Avigail

    With daily inspiration from The Beverly Hillbillies, how can you go wrong?

  • Tamar Fox

    Total turds.  Fo sho.

  • sharon

    …tastes like chicken!!

  • Cavanaugh

    The first must be false. Mike Huckabee has already changed the words of the Living G-d for political advancement, although he's certainly not the first to have done so, but he has not yet changed the Constitution (and not for want of desire to). So changing the words of the Living G-d must be easier than changing the Constitution; for the first, you just sit around and listen to your own arrogance and hatred drown out the voice of G-d, for the second you've got to convince an awful lot of people to buy the same delusional bullshit your arrogance and hatred has dreamed up.

    As for the second, a surprising proportion of Southerners can tell when a politician is trying to buddy up with them to get their vote. Talk about the Southern diet is usually one of three things: 1) A joke at the expense of a proud group of people for whom that diet often represents self-sufficiency and independence, 2) An attempt to manipulate that same group of people by appealing to their self-sufficiency and independence, 3) Both of the above at once. Tomorrow will tell if too many of the Southerners who get the joke will just stay home on primary day, or if they'll actually turn out to show Mike he can't buy their vote with a particularly awful recipe.

  • Kiku

    Obviously, turds. The first quote is mixing up church and state like a damned daquiri, and the second one is the kind of hokey faux-folksiness that was treyf before he even mentioned fried squirrel.

    He'll never keep that weight off, all nostalgic about deep fried rodent.