Religion & Beliefs
Why I Believe in G-d (And You Should Too)
By punktorah / September 30, 2009
52% of Jews do not believe in G_d. Apparently, being G_d’s chosen people does not preclude actual belief in said deity.
I have to admit that this is a problem for me. And it really shouldn’t be. A quick mental check list of my Jewish friends reveals that most of the Jews I know are secular, atheist, "culturally Jewish," or whatever label you want.
I just feel sad that these Jews don’t believe in something other than bagels and Seinfeld. Sure, you can connect to Judaism through your family, tradition, a sense of longing, history, culture. I’m not going to say that these things are wrong. They’re amazing if they are right for you! I respect everyone’s faith or lack of, as long as its genuine.
What I want to do is throw out a crazy idea: that believing in G_d is not as difficult nor archaic as anyone makes it out to be, and that believing in G_d can give you more than you can possibly imagine.
First, I have to tell a story. One that I don’t tell a lot of people.
When I was 24, I had a profound religious experience. I was lying in bed, slowly waking up, and I felt this warm glow cover me. I had never had an experience like this before. I felt like I had a gallon of hot tea flowing through my whole body and this radiant spirit came over me. And I knew, despite disbelief in a Creator G_d, an absence of religious upbringing in my childhood and a general belief that this-is-all-there-is-to-life-get-used-to-it, that I had an encounter with the Holy.
I knew this G_d to be the Jewish G_d because the connection was singular. No Jesus, no Mohammed, no anything. It was one spirit, indivisible, that came over me and wrapped me in gentleness and love. I’m not going to explain it any further than that, because most people don’t believe me and want more explanations. Sorry, I’m not here to give evidence to that.
As I began to learn my Jewish Path, I came across the Modeh Ani. Our Sages believe that our spirit leaves us in sleep and returns as we awaken. I understood that idea: it was dramatically similar to what happened to me.
So I lucked out. I touched this divine feeling without any work of my own. And I understand why it must be hard for the rational among us to believe in any of this. Frankly, I had my doubts to begin with.
But what I learned, from choosing G_d, is that the world is better when G_d is there. Simple things become easier to deal with, when you know that your life is worth more than what you make of it. Sure, there is still pain and stress, but my burden is not just mine, my families, or my friends to bear. Hashem is there to take it all on with me.
I believe that the world was created with love: that Creation is an expression of a deep, unwavering connection between all of Hashem’s creatures and the Divine spark that is within everything. When you believe that the world is worth more than what you can pillage and rape from it, you develop a respect for Life that is profound.
The connection of Humanity to G_d is a relationship: part parent/child, part marriage, part adversary, part friend. And like all relationships, our relationship to G_d changes overtime. The spirituality I have as a senior citizen is going to be radically different that the one I have as a 20-something rock and roll douche bag. Through the revelations of our tradition, we find that our notion of G_d is free to change. We don’t have to throw out the baby with the bath water.
The best part about loving G_d is that you realize how pathetic all the reasons to hate G_d are! Science and religion got you down? Believe in G_d, and you will suddenly find that you want to learn more about science, because you can connect to G_d through the tools used to make the world. Legalism and guilt mean nothing when you know that the sum of the entire universe times infinity is looking down on you, not scolding you for breaking the rules, but smiling because you are sincerely trying to do good for yourself, for others, and for Hashem. Tikkun olam is a great feeling: but it’s even better when it goes from feeding the homeless, to feeding the Master of the Universe.
This may seem like pathetic dribble from a mindless Believer, pathetic and childish. That’s OK. But here’s a suggestion: if you don’t believe in G_d, then fake it! Pretend like all the things I say are true. Live it. Take it in. Study it. You might find you like it. And when you do, maybe you’ll feel a connection to G_d in your own way. And if you don’t, what have you lost?
Wherever you are, wherever you want to go, G_d is there. Just reach out.
POST A COMMENT
I couldn’t help but smile while reading your article. I, too, have had that encounter with the Divine and it is both humbling and deeply moving. My atheist friend doesn’t understand why I care what she believes, (or doesn’t believe). It’s because I love her and truly want her to know the enormity of what’s out there. In a poor attempt at analogy, it’s like if you’ve visited Israel or Rome or some other phenomenally spiritual, historical, cultural, place, and you’re trying to share that with someone who thinks it’s enough to read about it in National Geographic…that analogy is dramatically lacking. I’ll try again; Going through life without knowing G-d is like taking a cruise, and eating crackers in your room, because you don’t know there is a wonderful buffet available all day and night. (I sort of borrowed and modified that one.) My son is agnostic but I tell him to keep praying for that encounter with Him. If He doesn’t exist, the worst that could happen is you’re talking to yourself, but if He does exist, eternity opens up to you and you’ll meet the best friend you could ever have.
I’m sorry to see your apology wasn’t accepted. I’ve recently been in that exact position myself.
p.s. Does anyone here know Yiddish?
Seriously? Let me restate: "what have you lost?" is the attack on my atheism. That’s precisely the condescending bullshit part that shows how little you respect people’s choices. It is meant to devalue what I have to lose. Why do you keep insisting that what I have to lose has no value?
I’m certainly not going to censor myself on the Internet for the purposes of onaas dvorim, and when someone’s being a dipshit, I don’t see why I shouldn’t call them out on it. Here’s my favorite definition, from the Urban Dictionary:
"A despised person; a moron; an ineffectual person; one with a habit of being wrong, loudly and often."
Similarly, I use the word bullshit because it means something very specific. As long as we’re recommending books, I suggest Frankfurt’s On Bullshit, where he describes bullshit as the type of speech where it doesn’t matter if it’s true or not.
I respectfully implore you not to describe people you disagree with on
the subject of Jewish spirituality as a "dipshit," sex with insects
(gnats?), "suicide bombers," "self-centered" etc. …Again, urgently and respectfully suggest not calling people "batshit"
and "self-centered," when you are trying to state a sincere position.
I’m offended that you think I’m being insincere when I call people batshit or self-centered. Would you prefer "fucking nuts?" What the hell is this? Are there impressionable minors present or something?
Have you considered trying to "connect" again, now that you are an
older adult, using techniques from books like Aryeh Kaplan’s "Jewish
Meditation" and Yitzhak Buxbaum’s "Jewish Spiritual Practices"?
No, but I did learn a lot about the Documentary hypothesis and ancient Middle Eastern theologies. The way I connected to God was to study where the mythologies from which he emerged.
Now with regard to your citations to scientific and Biblical historical
analysis — you view the Biblical text as in some way fabricated for
political gains?
Of course not! The Biblical text was wholly fabricated for political gains, complex and rich though it may be. Have you ever read Benedict Anderson? Come to think of it, have you ever read the entire Bible, or even just the Tanakh in the original, untranslated, unexpurgated, unvarnished Hebrew? I did, (less a few of the later books), and let me tell you, it is some scary, horrible stuff.
And before you protest, it wasn’t simply that God answered or didn’t answer my prayers, or what I read in the Bible, or some formal traditionalist conception of God, or a fight with my parents or teachers, or lack of effort or lack of religious knowledge on my part that made me an atheist. I’m an atheist because there are no gods, but conveniently empty symbols used to consolidate power. Endlessly fascinating, but not real in the slightest.
Finally, you keep referencing "reason" as though "reason" and mystical experiences are incompatible.
If you met a homeless person on the subway and they told you that they had a mystical vision and talked directly to god, you’d probably think that they’re mentally ill. The mystical is incompatible with reason because the mystic is neither real nor reasonable. Mysticism, storied and ancient as it is, is still just bullshit. I enjoy it art, not in life.
Look, I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with meditation; it’s not even necessarily spiritual. Neither am I opposed to trying to set squirrels on fire using only your mind, but I’d be hard pressed to keep suggesting somebody get into it over and over when it’s clear that they think telekenetic squirrel arson is ridiculous and ineffective.
I would suggest a different view — based on my past in science, where
everything was subjected to empirical testing — why not try out some
of the Jewish spiritual practices? by yourself, in an experiential
manner. Test them carefully, over a period of weeks and months.
I did that for a year. And I passed! Then I tried other gods and ways of believing in the divine, outside of Judaism. And then I passed on those too. But you know, maybe they’ll work for you! You should really quit rabbinical school and become a mambo. Why not try out some of the Voudoun spiritual practices? By yourself, in an experiential manner. Have you read Urban Voodoo: A Beginner’s Guide to Afro-Carribbean Magic? If you haven’t, you really should. Talk about mystical spiritual techniques! Blows shlogn kapores right out of the water.
It’s this patronizing, disrepect-as-compassion aspect of proselytizing (but more specifically the way you and Aleph are doing it) that really grates on me, and I know it grates on others as well.
P. S. "gnats?" Hilarious.
There’s an awful lot to cover here. And frankly, I don’t have the time.
So here’s what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna say I’m sorry.
I’m sorry that you feel attacked for your Atheism. Wasn’t my plan. I‘ll restate what I said before:
"Live it. Take it in. Study it. You might find you like it. And when you do, maybe you’ll feel a connection to G_d in your own way. And if you don’t, what have you lost?"
Un fun dem zol zayn a sof.
1. I’m not out to try to establish anything theological as a fact.
2. Our point in living (God or not) is to work to improve things in the world as best as we can.
The idea that I’m not taller could be depressing, too. But believing in something because it makes you feel better certainly won’t make it so. And rewriting the fabric of the universe so that you, one single person, can feel better, seems extremely and unjustifiably selfish from a philosophical point of view. Is there some law of physics prevents some aspects of reality from being depressing? I could get bummed out that pi has all those numbers at the after the decimal point, but believing that pi = 4 for my own personal sake doesn’t make it so. I find the fact that we’re alone out here liberating, but you don’t have to. All I can say is that I don’t find the the idea that humans are the absolute highest power in the universe depressing (although you’d have to define "power" and grant that humans are monolithic).
Every argument I have with theists ends up in the same place–if there’s no god, there’s no point to living, and I’d have to kill myself. Well, the universe doesn’t need people like that (or anyone else, for that matter), and threatening suicide isn’t going to impress me. Don’t hold yourself (or your happiness) hostage in some kind of game to see whether or not gods exist! There’s even a third option if you want to keep believing: gnosticism. What if things suck because god is evil and hates us all? Ultimately I found that as pointless as thinking that god was responsible for all the good or both all the good and all the evil, or anything at all.
Also, I can’t both join an atheist organization (I have) AND argue with people who denigrate atheism at the same time?
Good morning Sunshine,
The idea that humans are the absolute highest power in the universe is a very depressing notion.
DJ, rather than putting your energy into arguing with theists, why not simply join an atheist club?
I was pretty tired and not entirely sober last night, but I stand by my comment.
Why would I call Patrick Aleph a dipshit when he’s just trying to share his mystical experience? Because if that was all this article was about, I would have said to myself, "oh, well, some guy had a vision. Who cares?" But the little personal tidbit about the hot tea was only incidental to the piece’s larger purpose. What I’m really upset about is that Patrick is a liar and obnoxious and insulting (whereas I am only the second two, when prompted).
Right up top, he says, " I respect everyone’s faith or lack of, as long as its genuine." Having dispensed with the bullshit boilerplate, he goes on:
"When you believe that the world is worth more than what you can pillage
and rape from it, you develop a respect for Life that is profound."
"The best part about loving G_d is that you realize how pathetic all the
reasons to hate G_d are!"
"Science and religion got you down?"
"Believe in
G_d, and you will suddenly find that you want to learn more about
science, because you can connect to G_d through the tools used to make
the world."
"if you don’t believe in G_d, then fake it! Pretend like all the things I say are true. Live it. Take it in. Study it."
"maybe you’ll feel a connection to G_d in your own way. And if you don’t, what have you lost?"
The whole point of this article is to devalue the choice I and other Jews made to be an atheist–in other words, it is completely obvious that he does not respect everyone’s lack of faith. Also, I learned that we atheists rape and pillage; we don’t respect life; we are alternately depressed and incurious about science. Later, in the comments, I learned we each place ourselves individually at the center of the universe, don’t think there are any consequences to our actions, and that "G_d can handle whatever label we assign to G_d" (except, presumably, "God").
So, first he starts off with an obvious lie, concludes that if I made an honest choice to disbelieve, I should really start lying to myself and others. All because he knows G_d made him a better person! I shudder to think what he was like before. On top of that, what’s the big deal about abandoning out my years of contemplation about the nature of the universe–because there is nothing to lose! Worse, Patrick doesn’t even believe this bullshit, because he never tried "faking" belief–instead he had some hallucinatory vision and was convinced on the spot.
I’m certainly argumentative when I’m being denigrated, but you’ll notice that I don’t proselytise for atheism. The tremendous irony here is that the Jewish version of the Golden Rule says, "Don’t do unto others what you would not have done to you" (and the rest is commentary). Christians, on the other hand, have a slightly different one ("Do unto others as you would have done unto you"), which is much more amenable to proselytizing. Had Patrick been a Jew for Jesus or a Satanist telling religious Jews that they have nothing to lose by abandoning their consciences and just pretending to drink the blood of Christ or sacrifice a goat to Baphomet, this would be a different story entirely.
I should say that I’m not being fair here–I don’t know for certain that Patrick doesn’t want to people to try to convert him and insult. Mr. Aleph, if you’re out there and I’m wrong about this, just send me your address and I’ll forward it to the Jehovah’s Witnesses and the Mormons and the Hari Krishnas and 770 Eastern Pkwy.
What could it hurt?
The truth!
"I knew this G_d to be the Jewish G_d because the connection was singular. No Jesus, no Mohammed, no anything."
Seriosly, Judaism is prophet based as Islam, I mean if you actually literallly beleive the mythis or truths in the Tanakh.
As far as Jewish mysticism/Kabbalah, that is even more problematic and chock full of ethical conflict and irony. Judaism, like any religion always had been a changing mix and match of theological, philophical and cultural borrowings, but the mystics and kabbalh represent a borrowing of some of worst superstitions of the age in which they were created.
Robin you challenge and interpret DJ and ask: Now with regard to your citations to scientific and Biblical historical
analysis — you view the Biblical text as in some way fabricated for
political gains? — I would suggest a second look at that idea — the
Biblical text is far more complex than that –it’s a very rich cultural
treasury –
Robin are you saying that large portions are not fabricated for politcal gain? You are kidding right? It is clear that large portions are exactly that, to empower particluar classes within acinet Hebrew communites, and also as a national founding myth against indigenous populations in lands to be settled.
Dear Friends:
Now some thoughts on G-d experiences in Judaism —
Patrick Aleph/punktorah — I am glad that you enjoyed my thoughts on Jewish
mysticism.
Now, like you, I have mixed feelings about the "fight club" "let’s argue"
aspects of rabbinic Judaism — if all we do is argue, there is little space for meditation, prayer or contemplation or learning texts.
But rabbinic Judaism is one of the foundations of the Judaism we have today,
and you might like some texts that summarize the rabbinic foundations of Jewish
mystical experiences like your own.
I recommend "Everyman’s Talmud" by Abraham Cohen and the "Ein Yaakov: The
Inspirational and Ethical Teachings of the Talmud," which cite extensively from
the mystical experiences and ethical teachings of the Talmudic rabbis.
Like you, some of them were questioned and/or attacked and the validity of their experiences challenged, but the tradition preserved both their views and those of their attackers.
BrookeLynn — experiences like Patrick Aleph’s were once very common in Judaism, but when Orthodoxy fell out of favor with Western European Jews in the 18th century, it unfortunately (temporarily) took Jewish mysticism with it.
Much of Judaism’s mystical literature did not resurface until the 1980s. I recommend Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan’s "Jewish Meditation" as a really good introductory text to simple, but very powerful Jewish spiritual practices, that can be easily learned by any interested person, no previous knowledge of Hebrew, liturgy, etc. required.
You are correct that Jewish mysticism sees G-d as valuing the "deed."
D.J. Waletzky — I respectfully implore you not to describe people you disagree with on the subject of Jewish spirituality as a "dipshit," sex with insects (gnats?), "suicide bombers," "self-centered" etc.
I know that in the heat of intense discussion it is hard to it is hard for a passionate and sincere person to keep in mind the prohibition on "onaas devarim" (hurtful speech). I am a very intense person myself in debates and not always successful in this matter.
With regard to your comments on my post –
You stated in your reply to me that you have "prior knowledge of Hebrew, Yiddish, liturgy — you?" and went to Camp Ramah.
Not sure what you’re saying here — but if you are challenging my credentials to comment on Jewish spirituality — I’m a rabbinical student.
In my experience teaching Jewish mysticism, I have found that knowledge of Hebrew, Yiddish and/or liturgy, Camp Ramah, etc. doesn’t always translate into a good knowledge of Jewish spiritual practices.
A number of my students were atheists/agnostics from Orthodox and Conservative homes, and while their knowledge of some areas of Judaism exceeded mine, they were astonished to learn that Judaism has a rich treasury of techniques for mystical contact with G-d.
I believe that every Jew, regardless of their knowledge or lack of knowledge of Hebrew, Yiddish, liturgy, etc., has their own "gate" into the Torah. There are many stories from the Hasidic rebbes in which unlearned Jews are welcomed into olam haba (afterlife) ahead of Jews who are learned.
became an atheist because God DID answer my prayers, and I couldn’t
figure out why I deserved to have my lavish and unnecessary desires met
while others who were blameless suffered. Of course, I’m way beyond
that, now; but the granting of my prayer (to be able to go to Camp
Ramah that summer) was the thing that started knocking down the
dominoes."
think that God’s failure to contact me was the proof I needed."
who thinks God talks to them is a batshit as anyone who thinks that God
owes them an explanation or an answer to their prayers. Only the
religious could possibly be so… self-centered. As I said before, I tried to connect with gods (and not just YHVH). It
didn’t work because, evidently, I have an unusually low tolerance for
bullshit"
Dear Friends:
I will have to break up my responses to the previous posts into two separate posts, one about Jewish atheism/agnosticism and one about the experiential aspects of Jewish mysticism. I ask your patience.
It seems to me that we are approaching this debate from a misunderstanding of the place of Jewish atheists and agnostics in our history and community.
Historically, there are many references to unbelievers (apikorsim) being part of the Jewish community — in the Tanach (Hebrew Bible) — long before the development of rabbinic Judaism –
Debates with them are recorded in the Talmud, as rabbinic Judaism formed.
There are continued references to them throughout Jewish history — for example, they were present at the courts of Hasidic rebbes — some continuing to donate to the rebbes’ work, others — evidently members of the 18th century Haskalah (enlightenment) — arriving to try and refute the rebbes’ teachings.
So Jewish atheists and agnostics have been solidly embedded in our community for many centuries.
There is a very good Jewish atheists and agnostics denomination of Judaism, Humanistic Judaism, which has an excellent website at:
http://www.shj.org/
I greatly admire Humanistic Judaism, though I don’t share their theology at all. Many atheist/agnostic Jews have found a warm welcome there.
While I am a committed theist, I have referred many atheists and
agnostics to Humanistic Judaism. Patrick Aleph, perhaps your atheist/agnostic friends
would be interested in it?
There is some Jewish theology discussing the place of atheists/agnostics in Judaism, besides the attacks on them as "apikorsim."
Rav Kook, a great Jewish mystic, who was Chief Rabbi of Israel prior to WWII, described them as noble "souls of fire" who had been reincarnated in this lifetime to keep those of us who are inclined to religion honest and self-questioning.
He viewed them as being present to purify corrupt and decayed forms of religious Judaism and to work for social reform.
Rabbi Moshe Leib of Sasov, a Hasidic rabbi of the 18th century, had this to say about them:
"There is no quality and there is no power of man that was created to no purpose. And even base and corrupt qualities can be uplifted to serve G-d. When, for example, haughty self-assurance is uplifted[,] it changes into a high assurance in the ways of G-d. But to what end can the denial of G-d have been created? This too can be uplifted through deeds of charity. For if someone comes to you and asks your help, you shall not turn his off with pious words, saying: ‘Have faith and take your troubles to G-d!’ You shall act as if there were no G-d, as if there were only one person in all the world who could help this man — only yourself."
I think the real questions for Jewish atheists and agnostics in our era are:
Are Jewish atheists and agnostics in our era continuing to live as Jews? Are they regularly studying Jewish cultural and secular texts? Are they participating in the Jewish community in a positive manner? Do their lives exemplify Jewish moral values? Are they passing Jewish values, culture and identity on to their children and students?
My final question to them is: have they thoroughly explored experiential forms of Jewish spirituality before rejecting it?
If their rejection of Jewish spirituality is solidly based on a previous thorough knowledge and practice of Judaism spirituality as adults — they’ve given it a try and it is not for them — and Jewish agnosticism/atheism/humanism has brought them happiness and contentment, then they are in the right place for them, and they are part of a long tradition within Judaism.
But where atheism/agnosticsm has not brought them contentment — or where they are visibly angry or unhappy with Judaism — or have lost their Jewish identity — that is when I have questions about atheism/agnosticism as the right choice for them.
Cordially,
Robin
all of them say "comment 30". This one:
There is something about going through the motions that can actually alter a person.
I guess I should have mentioned from the beginning that I don’t want to be altered into the kind of dipshit who goes around telling people they have a fantastic personal relationship with someone I made up and that they should, too. I already went through the motions; it’s better if you believe in it and makes you feel slimy when you don’t.
Good thing all I have to do is smile to be happy, right? I think it’s working!
I only skimmed it.
I think Patrick is very gutsy to have broached this topic.
Also, are you sober right now?
I never called you a dipshit for having faith in G_d. I called you a "dipshit who goes around telling people they have a fantastic personal relationship with someone [they] made up and that [you] should, too."
Frankly, I respect people who have a personal faith in whatever, if not their faith itself. But that’s not what this is–the post was directed at Jewish atheists and it’s really obnoxious. Talk about uncalled for! Of course it seemed "like pathetic dribble from a mindless Believer," and you knew it would. Did you really think it would work if you annoyed us into belief? Also, you misused the word "preclude" in the second sentence.
Hey DJ, I think it’s cool that you have your opinions. But calling someone a dipshit because they have faith in G_d is uncalled for. No one called you a dipshit for not having faith.
DJ
Be very happy you aren’t a non-believing Christian!
Btw, I read your Jwitness phone call post @ your blog today. That was very amusing!
ps
Why don’t you like/grant interviews to English speaking media?
There is something about going through the motions that can actually alter a person.
I guess I should have mentioned from the beginning that I don’t want to be altered into the kind of dipshit who goes around telling people they have a fantastic personal relationship with someone I made up and that they should, too. I already went through the motions; it’s better if you believe in it and makes you feel slimy when you don’t.
Good thing all I have to do is smile to be happy, right? I think it’s working!
1) I already have prior knowledge of Hebrew, Yiddish, liturgy, etc. You?
2) I didn’t become an atheist because God didn’t answer my prayers. I
became an atheist because God DID answer my prayers, and I couldn’t
figure out why I deserved to have my lavish and unnecessary desires met
while others who were blameless suffered. Of course, I’m way beyond
that, now; but the granting of my prayer (to be able to go to Camp
Ramah that summer) was the thing that started knocking down the
dominoes.
Much as I don’t consider myself the center of the universe, I don’t
think that God’s failure to contact me was the proof I needed. Anyone
who thinks God talks to them is a batshit as anyone who thinks that God
owes them an explanation or an answer to their prayers. Only the
religious could possibly be so… self-centered.
As I said before, I tried to connect with gods (and not just YHVH). It didn’t work because, evidently, I have an unusually low tolerance for bullshit.
I just wrote a response to this post on my Facebook and I think it hits at some of the issues here as regards to belief…
Imagine that you’ve been married to the same person for 50 years. You’d be pretty damn sure that you knew every single thing there was to know about him/her.
But in reality, you couldn’t. Even someone that you have lived with, had sex with, eaten with, for that many years, will still have stories, ideas, feelings, beliefs, that you won’t capture.
That’s just two human beings. Try to imagine having that with the Ultimate Divinity of the Universe. It would be impossible.
So over time, we do the best we can. Like any relationship, we allow it to grow, change, develop, whatever it takes to connect. Relationship counselors say that growing with your partner, allowing your relationship to evolve to meet each other’s needs, is the best way to keep it together.
I would say that’s how G_d works. A relationship between us and something that is impossible to completely grasp. Yet, we still can.
The best part? Like any relationship, it’s built on one premise…"I promise to love and cherish you, forever."
Hey Robin, thank you for your insight on the Jewish mystical tradition. I think Rabbinic Judaism is what creates the core of Jewish Atheism, because it takes away the feeling and experience of G_d and turns G_d into something debatable. Good form!
Brooklyn and DJ, I think I’ll leave you guys to yourselves ;-) The convo is a little past my post…except to say that, in terms of "faking belief" there is some scientific research (I want to say its cognitive behavioral therapy but I could be mistaken) that suggests that when people smile, they can make themselves happy. There is something about going through the motions that can actually alter a person. I recommend AJ Jacobs book "A Year of Living Biblically" where, as an atheist, he lived as a biblical literalist. He now calls himself a "reverent agnostic". I see that as a brilliant example–he connected to SOMETHING reverent…by faking it at first.
Mystikiel – all I can say to that is, you weren’t there, you didn’t experience it, you can’t judge it. It can be insane to you, that’s fine :-) I know what happened to me and my life is better because of it. I wouldn’t take it back for the world.
"When I was 24, I had a profound religious experience. I was lying in
bed, slowly waking up, and I felt this warm glow cover me."
And that’s how I knew that Jesus really loved me. But wait –
"I knew this G_d to be the Jewish G_d because the connection was singular. No Jesus, no Mohammed, no anything."
That still leaves the Zoroastrian god and the Sikh god. Of course, Islam doesn’t deify Mohammed in the slightest – he’s just a prophet (pbuh) – so Im not sure you can discount Islan either.
OTOH, If you really want to play the percentages you are probably better off with Jesus. If the Christians are right, then only the Jesus people get into heaven, whereas if the Muslims or Jews are right, Christians still get a ticket upstairs. Unless you can come up with something more specific than a feeling of "warm tea". Was there a slight smell of cottage cheese in the air by chance?
Dear Friends:
As usual, I find myself agreeing with Patrick Aleph.
But I understand D.J.Waletzky’s outlook, as I myself was, for many years, an atheist/agnostic, who regarded my spritually-minded acquaintances as deluded, unscientific fools.
What I found, after learning more about the mystical practices of Judaism and other faiths, is that Judaism, like every spiritual civilization, has texts on simple ways to achieve and enhance mystical experiences that can be directly tested by people who have not yet had any connection with G-d.
When one has had no direct, experiential evidence of G-d, it is very hard to accept any descriptions of the spiritual experiences of other people. People reporting G-d experiences appear to a committed atheist or agnostic as simpletons.
What I used to tell my Jewish mysticism/Kabbalah classes — filled with skeptics and partial believers of all types of Jewish and non-Jewish backgrounds — was, "try the Jewish mystical and meditative practices for a few weeks. If one practice seems unsatisfactory, try another. Sooner or later your gateway into the Torah will open. The question is not whether you will have an experience of G-d — if you practice a technique you are comfortable with for a sustained period of time in a receptive frame of mind, you will have one. The question is: what will you do when you are summoned?"
One very good text is Yitzhak Buxbaum’s book, "Jewish Spiritual Practices." No prior knowledge of Hebrew, Yiddish, liturgy, etc. is needed, as all terms are translated, and each meditation and prayer technique is carefully explained.
A number of the atheists and agnostics in my classes, like Waletzky, were very embittered against Jewish G-d concepts, prayer, etc. — why hadn’t G-d ever replied to their prayers? wasn’t the non-response to their prayers proof that G-d didn’t exist? why hadn’t G-d contacted them? G-d’s failure to contact them must prove that G-d didn’t exist, etc. —
but when I asked if they had prayed or meditated recently and asked G-d sincerely for contact — or read any texts on Jewish mysticism "contact" techniques — the answer was always "no."
Most of them had abandoned or lost their interest in G-d concepts as teens, often after bar/bat mitzvah age, after souring on Judaism thanks to inadequate teaching materials about Jewish texts and beliefs.
I pointed out that they would not expect to learn a foreign language by giving up the study of poorly-written children’s texts about it at age 13, and then complaining that they never became fluent in the language.
They would expect to obtain texts appropriate to adults, find ones that "worked" for them, and then invest some effort in learning the language.
A few people, like Patrick Aleph, are blessed with an innate "connection" to olam haba. But the connection is not confined to a lucky few, and can be acquired by anyone willing to invest a few weeks or months in the practice of Jewish meditative and contemplative techniques.
Cordially,
Robin
A polytheist reveals her true colors! =)
My apologies: I said "Ra" when I should have specified "Ra-Horus-Aten" of the first monotheistic religion, Atenism.
Anyway, Egyptian gods die and are reborn all the time. I think it has to do with tax problems.
Oh yes, Ra, the sun god whose light was knocked-out, shortly after the Nile River god was bloodied-up by our One God.
There’s nothing about atheism that precludes thinking outside of yourself. My personal worldview precludes me from seing the world as a giant jigsaw puzzle, but I don’t think you have to believe in gods to have that kind of outlook, either.
The closer I got to the abstraction of "God," the more I saw it as a device in a power play. Instead of delving into the myth, I became much more interested in the myth-makers. As I argued in my bar-mitzvah speech, the reason priests and kings forged the documents that make up our canon today is because they needed access to the authority of God to realize their short-term political goals. I don’t feel like the squabbles between Northern and Southern Kingdoms is particularly relevant to my life today, so I don’t reenact them.
Ultimately, there’s a difference of approach here. When I "hit an area that defies logic," which is to say, when I encounter something I don’t understand, I investigate it. Some people ignore it; some people try to kill it; and some people sacralize the fact that they can’t understand it. If you think the unknown is always the unknowable, go be a priest instead of a scientist. That’s why Richard Dawkins talks about "the god of the gaps" — the phenomenon of modern people claiming that what science doesn’t know now it could never hope to know, and so that which science cannot access must be supernatural.
When people think something’s unknowable, they say, "you might as well ask why the sky is blue." In the Talmud it says the sky is blue because it "the sky
resembles God’s Throne of Glory…as it is written: ‘Above the sky over
their heads was the semblance of a throne, like sapphire in
appearance.”" Now, that might sound incredibly insightful to someone who doesn’t know what nitrogen is, but to me it sounds like a bullshit explanation you might give to a child (and don’t even get me started on the Kabbalah). Today, we know why the sky is blue, and it has to do with reimission spectra and the molar volume of nitrogen in the atmosphere. Should we blame the ancients because they had no idea light travels as both a particle and a wave? No, but it doesn’t mean that their ideas retain the same relevancy.
You can strip away all the religious traditions, all the preconceptions, all the stuff that you don’t like about how other people believe in god, but in the end, you’re just sacralizing your ignorance. Believe me, I tried. Early biologists (whose work has now been disproven) used to say, "ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny," which meant that the embryos of animals go through stages which resemble earlier branches of their evolutionary tree before they are born. When I hit an area that defied logic (Judaism), I investigated the evolution of religion, going backwards: I tried fundamentalism, non-denominational belief, ‘liberal Judaism,’ polytheism, pantheism, gnosticism, agnosticism, and finally saw that God is a problem that other people have with the world.
P. S. If I wanted to flirt with the original monotheism, I’d be worshipping the Egyptian Sun-god Ra, but thanks for the suggestion!
"In any case, arguing that the way to get closer to people is to get closer to an abstraction is silly."
Think of it as getting to know somesone’s abstract thoughts & mind vs. their physical brain, getting to know them via their soul vs. the mechanical shell of their body.
"Ultimately, the nuances and subtleties of religious meditation all add up to introspection, which is selfish by definition."
There is no shortage of pointless "spiritual" meditation. To my mind, true religious meditation, or examination (I’m not a prayer, or chant person myself) is the opposite of introspection. For example, say you have hit some tough times. You’re a drug addict, with everything that goes along with that (lying, cheating, stealing, you’ve burned every bridge, everyone you know hates you, & you’re out of resources). What will help keep you from just going & jumping off a bridge? You will need to be able to think outside of yourself. It will be very important to see things "through God’s eyes". You’ll need to be able to see, however briefly, the giant jigsaw puzzle that is this world, and recognize yourself as being a piece in it. It’s a serious bitch having a 3,000 piece puzzle & missing 1 piece. On it’s own that piece is seemingly nothing special, but when it’s gone, is has an important detrimental impact in the big picture.
"I suppose the bottom line for me is that spiritual strength was of little endurance in the face of reasoning, which is why reason is so feared and despised."
I agree with you, give me the facts first! But when you hit an area that defies logic, Judaism, the original monotheism, is there for you.
Look, cherry-picking a positive example of what faith can do for you doesn’t alter the totality of the situation. Patrick said,
"I’m so wholly connected to that sense of Purpose that it’s impossible.
Faking belief, I think, is easier. If you’re convinced that something
isn’t there, that there are no consequences to your actions, then you
can fake it. And nothing bad can come of it."
Who the hell knows what he thinks that Puropse is? He could have entitled this piece "Why I Fuck G-ats (And Why You Should Too)" and told us all that the only way to truly be one with nature was to be one with some animals. To say "nothing bad can come of it" discounts the likely possibility that some people will take a spiritual journey and end up at a destination you don’t endorse. Don’t you think suicide bombers have an intense and spiritual relationship with Allah, a transcendental bond they trust cannot be severed, even by death?
As far as I’m concerned, all religions are equally (in)valid, but in practical terms, some spiritual paths are more dangerous to passers-by than others. In any case, arguing that the way to get closer to people is to get closer to an abstraction is silly. If you want to connect outwardly, do it with people. Ultimately, the nuances and subtleties of religious meditation all add up to introspection, which is selfish by definition.
I suppose the bottom line for me is that spiritual strength was of little endurance in the face of reasoning, which is why reason is so feared and despised.
Patrick, thank you for your kind words above. And thanks for breaking the ice with a metaphysical topic.
D.J., I’ll just comment on a few of your points.
Being a parent of 5, & choosing to go through a risky surgery and painful recovery to donate a kidney for a complete stranger is a very rare thing indeed.
One of the central issues in theology, is that "God" means different things to different people. To me, It’s the power source that sets everything in motion.
The difference between God-given spiritual strength and simply positive mojo (for lack of a better word) is the depth & endurance of the experience.
Unlike some other topics, the spiritual dimension of humanity takes a higher degree of finesse & nuance to write about. This is all from me for right now.
It just seems as though promoting the practical and temporary benefits of "God" or "G_d" has nothing to do with whether or not it exists. "Act as if ye have faith and faith shall be given to you" isn’t just New Testament bullshit, it’s also the mechanism behind things like stock market bubbles.
This line of reasoning feels to me like a sales pitch to invest with Madoff or Enron. Who cares what the facts were? You got a rush when it looked like you made money, and if that’s not right, who knows what’s wrong?
This "if it feels God, do it" argument carries about as much weight as saying the sun revolves around the Earth or that our crops didn’t fail because we made the appropriate sacrifices to Moloch. You can’t argue with success, unless you care whether or not the perception of success is ultimately based on fact.
Hey Brookelyn, I really like what you have to say. You really it my argument on the head–a lot better than I did, actually. Thank you for your insight.
D.J. – I agree with you that it’s completely pointless to pray when your heart isn’t in it. With the exception of saying the Shma, I never pray. Prayer is supposed to be an aid for us. If it’s not a good tool for changing our attitude & the manner in which we relate with our surroundings, we can select some of the many other Mitzvot. We need to keep our actions fresh. Visit the sick. Return something that has been stolen. Donate some money, completely anonymously. (I think that last one even counts as a double-mitzvah!)
For me, personally, I’d only ever think about God’s divine involvment in my life when it comes to births & deaths. And then, when I started keeping kosher, I’d always think about the solemn death of the animal that was on my plate. And since I happen to do a lot of cooking, this type of thing stays in the front of my mind, as I’m constantly thinking about tweeking certain recipes. Every time I do this mental exercise, to examine ingredients to make sure it’s completely kosher, I’m bringing the spiritual into my daily life & I can feel it. For a moment I get a glimpe of my tiny place in the vast reality of creation. This acts as a prayer for me.
I’ve found modern-Orthodox Jews to be among some of the most spiritually atuned people I’ve ever come in contact with. They don’t believe in coincidences. For example, if a bus drives right by a bus stop, & there are 3 people standing there, there’s not just 1 reason that the bus didn’t stop. There are three separate reasons for each of those 3 people that the bus didn’t stop to pick them up. Sometimes their spiritual outlook rubs off on me. As I said, it has to be a birth or a death before I start thinking about God’s active involvement in my life. Just recently, I found out my first true love from L.A. died on the exact same date as my grandmother. It starts me to thinking, "What is the message to me here?"
Another recent situation- involves a modern-Orthodox woman I know who was getting ready to donate a kidney to a very sick friend of her husband’s who needed the transplant. It turns out, that he couldn’t use hers after all, even though initially they were compatible. She decided to go through the operation anyway & give her kidney to a complete stranger. That is faith in G-d! Now I’d be thinking, "What if I gave someone my spare kidney to save his life, & then he started hitting the bottle or getting out of shape?!" I’d be pissed! The kidney donor woman went through a lot of spiritual analysis before she did this, & she came to the conclusion that just because she doesn’t know the recipient personally, does not make his life any less valuable in God’s eyes.
We can tap into much strength that we might not have realized that we had by simply recognizing the divinity in the world, and especially within humanity.
Watching this unravel isn’t really that elucidating. It doesn’t seem to matter to you if anything is particularly real or true; it also seems like G_d is central to your life because it makes you happy at the time, which could just as easily be said for cough syrup.
Honestly, I think it’s disrepectful for people to go through the motions if they don’t believe in it. I did when I was religious and I still do as an atheist. That’s why I can’t join a minyan, even though I know all the prayers. I know what they mean in the original Hebrew, and I really can’t bring myself to utter those words.
Thank you for sharing your epiphany, Patrick! That is a very rare experience in Judaism.
I don’t think anyone should let theological doubts hold them up from a soul-stiring Jewish experience. By performing mitzvahs you will automatically bring the spiritual into your daily existence. Judaism’s strength is in the actions & not the creed. Belief in "God" isn’t a prerequisite, to my mind.
I see bumper stickers saying,"Practice random acts of kindness." In Judaism, there is nothing random about the actions; they’re very deliberate. This is a good thing. How many times would we wait until we’re feeling in the mood to donate our time, & then nothing ever happens? Schedule mitzvahs, do them & the strong, inspired feelings will follow. It’s a funny thing–this happens to be the exact same advice that marriage counselors give to their clients. You hate each other right now? Pretend/act like you love each other! By performing loving & considerate actions for the other person, the feelings will start to change. (This is why it’s so easy for movie stars in leading romantic roles to fall for each other.)
"if you don’t believe in G_d, then fake it! Pretend like all the things
I say are true. Live it. Take it in. Study it. You might find you like
it. And when you do, maybe you’ll feel a connection to G_d in your own
way. And if you don’t, what have you lost?"
There’s profoundly off about that. Faking things is wrong. Its lying to yourself and lying to others. When you lie you loose your self-respect and your dignity.
Praying and studying and going through the motions when you know in your heart it’s all nonsense would make you feel like a fraud or a fool.
Lemme clarify, because that was an extremely confusing reply to your comment. I’m really high on cough medicine right now…haha. So I’m doing the best I can with my limited mental resources.
When there is nothing sacred in the Universe, there is nothing central to your life other than whatever just seems to make you happy at the time. I think that’s sorta sad…that’s all. It’s not a personal judgement AGAINST it. It’s just feelings.
I can’t fake disbelief because I’m so wholly connected to that sense of Purpose that it’s impossible. Faking belief, I think, is easier. If you’re convinced that something isn’t there, that there are no consequences to your actions, then you can fake it. And nothing bad can come of it. And you might find you like it. And if you do like it, you might find your G_d energy. If you don’t, screw it…it’s like taking up a hobby then abandoning it. But give it a shot.
It’s easy, I think, to believe in G_d because G_d is such an open-ended thing. And I think, G_d can handle whatever label we assign to G_d…whether you believe that G_d made the world in six days (which I don’t) or that G_d is the sum of all things (which I somewhat do), or that G_d is the energy it takes to create godliness in one’s life (which I somewhat do) or that G_d is our protector, creator of all things in love, the great inspiration, the breath we hold in fear when we are confronted with something we can’t handle…and conversely, the breath we exhale when we are relieved (which I do!)
You can’t fake disbelief, but non-believers can fake belief? I place myself at the center at the universe because I don’t believe in god? Is it not that hard to believe in god, or not that hard to believe in anything?
You don’t have my pity, Emily. You have my respect, actually ;-)
"I just feel sad that these Jews don’t believe in something other than bagels and Seinfeld."
We don’t need your pity, honey.
I guess I would argue that it’s really not that hard to believe. Atheism is the luxury of the person who can put themselves as the center of the Universe. I lucked out and had an experience that most people don’t have. I cheated, essentially. But I hope that I can help bring people and G_d together, in some way, somehow. And you are right, it’s all about respect. I can’t fake disbelief unfortunately — it would be like pretending that my mother doesn’t love me.
…this is exactly how I feel about atheism! I also think that being angry at gods is pathetic; almost as pathetic as loving them. Becoming an atheist means ending your relationship with your imaginary friends. When I finally ran out of ways to believe in deities, I can’t say it was like drinking a gallon of hot tea–more like taking a giant shit. I feel much better now than when I was trying to justify my belief in something unbelievable.
As long as we’re respecting "everyone’s faith or lack [there]of," why don’t we switch–you can fake disbelieving while I fake believing again?
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