How Pure Are Purity Balls?

I wouldn't have any problem with a mother-son ball, or for that matter a mother/daughter or father/son event (although you won't ever catch me and Mr. zbird Senior dancing together outside of a hora, and as a teenager I would have rather watched Golden Girls rerurns all night than go on a date with either parent).

But I'm a bit troubled by the implications of your "why haven't I heard of some other parent/child permutation gala" objection. Can't mothers and fathers ever decide to do what they think is a good thing for one child without getting heartburn over whether it's "fair" to the other sex?

As for whether mothers or fathers are better suited to teach their daughters about dignity, purity, virginity, etc.--don't you think parents should decide for themselves who should teach what? And is it really an either/or proposition?

--Z

No, Tamar, trust me, it's not just you who is creeped out by "Purity Balls". 

Just take all those phallic symbols, starting with the naked crucifix (stripped of the habitually nude-but-for-a-loincloth Jesus, lest the virgins get turned on by accident). Oy, and those raised swords lifted high by stiff-armed men...to say nothing of the fathers pressing their daughters against their bodies, faces nuzzling, after she's put her 'flower' at the base of the cross....feh!

Why feh?  How NOT feh?  All those men at some point during the perfervid preparations for this "purity" ball, have likely been thinking in some direct or indirect way about their daughters' untouched, unpenetrated, unfingered, pert, barely-haired pubes, and how they may as yet be the only males who've seen their daughters' privates - albeit years ago in the bathtub as uber-virginal babes.  

So, with these kinds of images pulsating somewhere just beneath the surface, and the girls all dimly aware that what they use to micturate with is suddenly a VERY hot commodity, one can't help conjecture that such balls heighten and focus attention on what lies hidden within all those little white pairs of panites rather than on the girls' minds, personalities, and intellectual accoutrements.  It also - let's be honest - focuses the fathers' attention on the carnal knowledge they possess regarding what men will eventually do with all those little freshly bathed and perfumed hymens.  On some level, can anyone doubt that some men and some girls will get very, very turned on by this?  Can deflowering be thus far behind?  Are these balls thus not counter-productive?  There's a PhD in all this, just bursting at the seams. 

In any case, "Purity Balls" creep me out to the max. They night as well end these balls with a Burka Donning ceremony to wrap things up so to speak?  

I just hope those poor girls have access to a time machine and can step out of their fathers' reality-defying warp.  

I still believe enough in mankind to conclude that most of these fathers are not lusting in any way after their own daughters. 

On the other hand, any father who takes his daughter to one of these things should keep a close eye on the other fathers. 

--Z

Oddly, I retain a pretty good grip on my faith in humanity as a whole.  

Individuals, on the other hand, can do weird things when they try and dam up the libido. It's too powerful a force to try and squelch.  If there was one honest man among those fathers, I'd love to have him say exactly what goes on in his mind and in his pants.  The sex (with the wife) when they get home that night must be wild!!!  

Mothers and sons are sidelined, adding to the suspicion that it is all just a hair or two away from Perve City. I mean, boys are the ones with the penetrating organ. Why aren't they pledging to keep it flaccid until their wedding night....They could be marched down a narrow aisle, with their mothers, towards, say, a circular basin (the edge trimmed with lots of colourful raffia so as not to be TOO suggestive of things pubic and vulval).  She could wrap her strong maternal hand around her son's right hand (or whichever he wanks with), clutching a special pen,  and help him write his pledge to stay flaccid and pure.  Then they could symbolically and very slowly insert the special pen straight into the center of the said raffia-trimmed receptacle....but I digress....

Probably there's no mother-son activity because society is less apt to accept women as dominant over boys - especially virgin boys just discovering nocturnal emissions, involuntary erections, etc.  But men can and do get away with dominance over their 'pure', submissive girls.   

Humans seem to be hard-wired that way, and I have no problem with that. I just ask for a bit of socio-sexual honesty. "Purity Balls" smell very fishy! 

That's hilarious.  It's also the surest way for the poor kid to have a 10-year erection, which of course will become flaccid just as he unzips his wife's wedding gown.

--Z

Purity balls are so creepy and sexist!

And what's up with those horrible Stepford Wives dresses? No woman has EVER looked good in one of those. 

What cracks me up about those dresses is that at my high school those would have been considered completely inappropriate and immodest.  My Tanach teacher would have called these allegedly-pure girls harlots.

this is almost as creepy as those wacky FLDS folks in Texas. it also reminds me of when Jessica Simpson's father made some crack about how his daughter has amazingly perky boobs. *cringe*

...and I see what everyone's talking about.  There's something eerily "Eyes Wide Shut" about the whole thing.  

--Z

It was hot.

or fingerling fish hatcheries, spawning and creating these obedient virgin-bots. Creepy to the max.  

And I've just read about the keys!  Daddy gives his little girl a key....  What's next?  Daddy hiking the psuedo-wedding dress up and slipping on a symbolic chastity belt, sliding the key in, then whispering a prayer in his little girl's ear, lips to her tender lobe,  and giving said key a sharp, defining turn ....

Anyone want to collaborate with me on a TV treatment?  This just BEGS for a satirical, darkly hilarious show all its own.  "Purity Balls" - there's the title.  6 episodes, maybe 9.  We wouldn't necessarily name the lead girl's character "Purity" either.   

--Z

Purity Balls - the movie!  

A movie would be a great idea, if "Saved!" hadn't already been made!

Let's make daughter into a total slut, and the whole town knows it--except her father. 

--Z

The erotic inner life of girls can be expressed in many ways - backseat fumblings being too obvious.  The father's libido would be simmering at all times, despite his straight-laced lifestyle.  I'd have the mother perhaps working from home, developing a line of JonBenet cosmetics for example.

I'd want to focus on the adults' hypocrisy and ignorance, rather than skewer Purity.  She'd be discovering her libido in other ways than being done by the high school football team.  The father-daughter electra thing would be played up, but with lots of dark humour.  Rampant sexuality would be expressed  - not via Purity per se - but in the wild bangfests with Daddies & Mommies right after the Ball ends which, I suspect, is a large part of what lubricates these Balls year after year.  Mommies get to serve as proxy virgins which Daddies (pretend to) deflower.  So, lots of (satirical) role playing & innuendo with the parents, while Purity starts to clue in, and gets very, very libidinous.  

I'd want to expose these Balls, and have people laughing so hard as to bring up pieces of lung at the same time.  

It wouldn't make sense for Purity's libido to get triggered by Mommy playing virgin with Daddy (ick).  

But we can introduce Purity's best friend (we don't need to call her Chastity), the preacher's daughter, who's 40-something father is just a bit more wealthy, sophisticated, educated, and good-looking than all the other dads....

Meanwhile, Chastity plays the part of the perfect virgin, showing no sexual interest in boys... until it's discovered she prefers women.. 

--Z

Y'know, Jon Kesselman of Hebrew Hammer fame is a strong proponent of Jewcy. I wonder if there's anything actually to this that he'd be interested in?

Hey, I love a medieval-themed party as much as the next guy...

Purity should be having an affair with Chastity's father (priest)

I shall look him up, most definitely.   I'm absolutely convinced this needs to be a film - particularly one with the kind of intelligence, brilliance, humour, and devastatingly witty social satire that the Mishpocha does as naturally as breathing.  (Pardon my unmitigated bias! Us gilgul types are the worst)

Anywho, I'm seeing it as exposing the hypocrisy and all the creepy ick via humour.  Girls, even very young ones, have libidinous urges; middle-class conservative Bible-belt men have sex on the brain. Most human beings do.  It's the trying to ritualize it away and control it in such a sexist way is the rub.  

I'll contact Kesselman and keep you posted.  Nothing adventured, nothing gained.   

Yeah, better they should follow the example of some notable Jewish dads like Avrohom Mondrowitz, Larry Flynt, Joel Steinberg and Hugh Hefner.

Perhaps Jewesses who worship in glass synogogues should not promiscuously toss stale bagels about.

Trey Cruz - I don't see Purity Balls as painted either Jewish or Gentile.  It's a social phenomenon, more a gender thing rather than a religious thing per se - at least that's the prism I'm looking through.  Not being contentious, just want to clarify.  

Re: glass synagogues and stale bagels - me personally,  my bagels never go stale. Ever had a Montreal bagel?  Enough said.  

Wait, are you saying Larry Flynt is Jewish?  

Respectfully Anna, having read your previous posts, it seems the only prism you have is sexual.

In the film scenario I have in mind, the families would be middle-class, white Anglo-Saxon Christians  - because these are the folks who seem to be having Purity Balls.   True, Trey, I could have mentioned that in my previous posts but a) it seemed self-evident, and b) it risked sending the whole phenom into the goy/non-goy ditch.  

My notion is to spoof the phenom, not just take pot shots at a particular group.  (Unless they are suitably hilarious pot-shots).  

That said, sex is big. And hard to imagine where we'd be without it, eh?   

It's already in the "goy/non goy ditch".

This whole talmudic goy hatred thing is old and used up.

And you seem to be the last one who doesn't realize what a bore merchandized sex has become.

 You need a new schtick

Well Trey, can the Second Coming be upon us?  

If one reads between your lines correctly, the "whole talmudic goy hatred thing [being] old an used up", then surely the planet is awash in love - now that we've had the tit-for-tat, i.e., "talmudic goy hatred" (tit) answered by 'biblical jew hatred" (tat) with its heady climax between 1938-1945, give or take, we're all good now.  Faaaaaantastic!    

I'm delighted to also learn from you that merchandized sex has now become "a bore".  

That's marvellous! So the kazillion dollar a day sex biz is, what, just running on fumes now?  Relieved to hear its all dried up.  Kudos for apparently having researched the topic thoroughly (I cite your listing all those (presumably) Jewish dreck merchants.  They'll all have to become, what, used Hummer salesmen or better yet, managers of Hummer & SUV recycling depots.  Glad times are just around the corner!  

So Trey Cruz, that's the crux of it - love rocks, and schlock is so boring that it's dead.

Re: my "schtick", sorry, but last time I checked, I don't have any, ergo, not in the market for a new one.  Isn't sophism a hoot?  I know!  Pot. Kettle. Black!  

Well now, what a feast!

I hardly know where to start.

Dialectically you are like a bird with one short wing forced to fly in circles.

Of course, you fall back on the "Holocaust" never mentioning Jewish culpability in the Soviet slaughters and gulag between 1917 and 1955.

Perhaps it is good that you are obsessed with sex; it is possibly the one thing you have a real aptitude for, showing no talent for history and no inclination to introspective honesty.

[Although I do enjoy your prose style: You have a talent for expressing yourself]

The "kazillion dollar a day" sex industry preys on addicts.

[it is fascinating and revealing in a Freudian sense that you would focus on the money aspect of this plague.........how wonderfully and stereotypically Jewish.....]

Addiction is a funny thing: The first few times the addict experiments with the source of his addiction it is exciting, but after he/she is "hooked" the life is grey, grim, desperate, mindless and boring.

But those on the inside rarely have the insight to accurately evaluate their own situation, ergo they remain stuck, like animals, like machines, obsessing over their one favorite bodily function, focussed on stimulating the nerve endings in their pelvic girdles to the exclusion of all else.

Sad.

Absurd.

Boring.

Vaguely reminiscent of Hollywood [of whom the porn/sex industry is the bastard child] which hasn't had a decent product in over half a century, instead peddling transparent remakes, gunfire/carchase/splatter movies, and let us not forget the de-rigeur leftist and gay propaganda.

 Ho Hum.

Oh, I would like to commend you for your pun: Cruz/Crux!

I liked it.

Trey

Oh, and, by the way; Flynt is not Jewish, he's methodist. I just tossed him in there to see if you were paying attention.

Feast?  Sounds someone is having a bagels & Maalox moment.  

Smoked red herrings anyone?  I had an Albanian wingnut in my EngLit class last term who spoke just like you do, chapter & verse.  Crazy.   How someone as ignorant as you declare me to be could smoke you out - without even trying is absolutely amazing. 

Seriously though, I'm delighted to have caused you such apoplectic mirth, not that any of this has anything to do with Purity Balls, to digress from your digression.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I must log off in order to do some serious kvelling brought on by your stunning statement: "[it is fascinating and revealing in a Freudian sense that you would focus on the money aspect of this plague.........how wonderfully and stereotypically Jewish.....] 

Really?  Please, really?  This is better than the Bat Mitzvah I never had!  You mean because I made a reference to money it means I'm Jewish?!  

Hallelujah!  The little bird "flying in circles" as you so touchingly painted me, is now fledged, a bone-fide Jew for mentioning money. Farklempt alert! It's just too beautiful!  The nerve endings in my pericardial sac, and wait, yes, even some in my pelvic girdle are all a-twitch.

The rest of your posting speaks so eloquently for itself that any further comment would be a desecration.   

Shalom! 

A fascinating mix of Freudian projection, ad hominem and female hysteria.

The sex industry in all its permutations has produced a murderous plague of std's [AIDs anyone?], destroyed lives and families, destroyed thousands of children [kiddie porn? ever heard of it?], has colonized poorer nations for the flesh of their young people , addicted and      hypnotized talented folk who would otherwise have been part of a productive intellectual elite; hypersexuality: sex taken and used out of all reasonable cultural context, corrodes, cheapens and eventually destroys the culture that falls into it's snare.

Does the name "Weimar" ring a bell?

 "Any further comment would be a desecration".............................?

  The word "desecration"springs from the word "sacred".........

  What have I desecrated?

  Is there something you value more than your own easy facility with language and your ability to indulge your sexual urges?

Something metaphysical?

Nah........can't be.

Weimar certainly rings a bell - how could it not? Your posts, as you warm to your subject, are chilling.

But go on, Trey, philosophy/psychology/history Master, we wait with bated breath for more such pearling drops of wisdom to trickle off your tongue and fevered brow.

Oh, and ah... if you have to ask what you've desecrated, there's no point in explaining.  

Buh-Bye!

PS: what the heck, (just in case).....say Hi to Katie!