| "Mind if I Shit in your Coffee" | |
 by amoosefloats, September 17, 2007
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COFFEE CRAPPED OUT OF ANIMALS!!!!!
Yes that is right there is a new trend in coffee, impress your friends with this expensive blend..... Kopi Luwak, is very expensive, and is made from coffee beans passed through the digestive system of an Indonesian animal, but it's more like a cat than a monkey. According to a feature article by the Manila Coffee House, which sells the stuff, the people who harvest the digested beans don't really have to pick through cat litter to get it. The animal processes the beans and excretes them whole, unscratched, and without dung.
The animal is a palm civet, a dark brown tree-dwelling cat-like creature found throughout Southeast Asia. The scientific name is paradoxurus hermaphroditus.
According to the Manila Coffee House, the palm civet just happens to like to ingest the ripest and reddest coffee beans, which also happen to be the ones best for brewing. The cat eats the outer covering of the beans in the same way that is accomplished by de-pulping machines. Something happens to the beans in the journey through the cat's intestines that gives it a flavor that is celebrated by coffee drinkers.
Now I am not that concerned with fashion to drink crapped out coffee, and I cant wait personally to hear people say how great it is. IT IS CRAPPED OUT OF A CAT.
Maybe i will feed popcorn to the little kitty next door and sieve it out of his cat box and market it as gourmet popcorn. Hell for $75 per quarter pound i will walk on over to starbucks and buy a pound of coffee beans eat them whole, crap them out then sell it as rare steve coffee.
I figure $10 a pound basic coffee 2 bowel movements a day i could crap out 200 bucks a day more if i use laxatives.
If i think about this too much i may bleed from the ears. what will people with more dollars than sense buy next. Hey people just get a regular cup of coffee and give the shit tax rebate to a nice charity.
coffee
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K
Unbelieveable
Wow. You have got to be freakin kidding me. How stupid can some people be?
Marcel
@K.. you have no idea
Guys, seriously, and I mean this in the most politest way possible, you guys have NO SERIOUS IDEA how delicious this coffee can be. I'm Indonesian, so bare with me:
Kopi Luwak, or Luwak Coffee, is indeed crapped out of this luwak cat.
These luwaks can smell and 'hand pick' the sweetest, ripest, best quality coffee available directly from the tree.
As you might already knew it, the coffee powder you guys having every morning and every possible minutes during the day are grounded beans, which means the fruit-meat are discarded.
The luwak cats, in contrast, just want the fruit meat, and as they cannot digest the beans, it's, you've figured it out, crapped.
The beans in the 'excess baggage' carries the best coffee flavour men could only imagine if men are told to be hand pick those coffee fruits.
the 75$ per quarter is NOT THAT EXPENSIVE compared to the experience that you will have starting from brewing the coffee.
The coffee itself should be prepared the Indonesian way: ground it very very very fine (like 3 times finer than espresso-ground), put like a tablespoon in a mug, and pour a nearly-boiled water (96-98 Celcious), stir good, simmer for 4-5 minutes, and enjoy it (for ease of reference, you can google 'the turkish coffee brewing method', it's almost the same process).
i can give you more information if you will, contact me at marcel[AT SIGN]marcellinosantoso[DOT]com
swag
Enough with this lame coffee already
This freak of marketing has been around for years. Back in 2003 they even featured it on Oprah Winfrey's show and an episode of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. You'll find references on Digg for this coffee going back over three years ago. This is NOT a new trend. If anything, four-year-old reruns of Oprah should spell the death of a trend:
http://www.thecoffeecritic.com/fusion3/html/kopi.shtml
But news travels very, very slowly for some people. And who doesn't like a good urban legend, a good fart joke, or a good cat crap coffee story to retell as if it's brand new? So this lame story about this lame coffee refuses to die, and people keep acting like this is some new fad or something.
Unfortunately, price does not always equate with quality. Just ask anyone who bought a US-Navy-issue toilet seat for $600 back in the 1980s. So what we have is scarcity of production and enough "coffee tourists" foolish enough to prop up the price in a small supply market thinking they're getting something exquisite and of exceptional quality.
What does the fool who knows nothing about wine do to try to impress his guests? He reaches for the most expensive bottle he can find with a good story to tell about it. Same here.
You won't find this coffee reviewed at respectable coffee tasting sites like coffeereview.com. Why? Because it's gimmick coffee. It's stuff for the coffee tourists who don't know any better and who are willing to pay through the nose for the story.
Coffee hater
Coffee News!
Swag, you say "But news travels very, very slowly for some people." But that's not really the issue. It's truer to say that only silly retards who believe that there is such a thing as a "respectable coffee tasting site" could think that there is ever "news" about coffee at all.
Why waste your time savoring endless varieties of coffee? Why not get a job? If you don't want a job, why not just pass your days jerking off into a sock?
Have a great Yom Kippur.
vazalt
Well... People eat eggs, and
Well... People eat eggs, and they come from an animal's butt (technically a cloaca, which is also the spanish/latin word for sewer)
Asim
you silly beans!!!
to be honest, today is the first day I have heard of this ''crappy'' coffee and I can pretty well say I give everything a try, so to say I would never try it would be a lie. Yes it sounds discusting but theres alot of things that do, ex: cow tongue, frog legs, snails..people call these delicacies, sure some are good some are gross, but you can't bash something until you've tried it atleast once!!!
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