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New Contest: Shmuley Boteach, Grizzly Bears, and More |
|
 by Boris Jackson, September 4, 2007 |
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Howdy.
Last week we ran a meta-contest with the promise that the winning entry would be this week’s contest. Because there were only two entries and because they were both darn good, I’ve decided to declare both of them winners. So, this week, you can respond to any of the following challenges:
#1) From Jennifer Predigerowitz:
If you really were a rich man, would you actually yiedel, diedel, daydel, diedel, diedel dum and biddy biddy bum?
Probably not, right?
So what would you really sing or do if you were a wealthy man?
#2) From necroemoticon:
Best name for Boris' beard style. (My suggestion: "The Tsiggee".)
Please note: If you cannot come up with an answer to #1 or #2, you may also respond to this challenge:
Come up with the …
Best concept for a reality show involving a grizzly bear, a naked used car salesman, and Kosher Sex Rabbi Shmuley Boteach.
Please remember that the deadline is Friday at 5:00 PM and that only registered members can win.
-BJ
Last week we ran a meta-contest with the promise that the winning entry would be this week’s contest. Because there were only two entries and because they were both darn good, I’ve decided to declare both of them winners. So, this week, you can respond to any of the following challenges:
#1) From Jennifer Predigerowitz:
If you really were a rich man, would you actually yiedel, diedel, daydel, diedel, diedel dum and biddy biddy bum?
Probably not, right?
So what would you really sing or do if you were a wealthy man?
#2) From necroemoticon:
Best name for Boris' beard style. (My suggestion: "The Tsiggee".)
Please note: If you cannot come up with an answer to #1 or #2, you may also respond to this challenge:
Come up with the …
Best concept for a reality show involving a grizzly bear, a naked used car salesman, and Kosher Sex Rabbi Shmuley Boteach.
Please remember that the deadline is Friday at 5:00 PM and that only registered members can win.
-BJ
 |
Boris Jackson lives in Kalamazoo, Michigan with his wife, Maria, and his four children: Julio, Jorge, Squirrelisha, and David. When not thinking of creative challenges, he enjoys bass fishing and playing with the family’s dog, Ralph. More... |
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Jennifer Predig...
Who ever did think of it?
Oh yes! It was me! The idea I tied with - the naming of Boris's beard is also a solid idea.
So let me start with the beard. I would call it Roger.
Now, what I would do if I were rich? Certainly not bid a bid bum. Things would be more like this: I'd yell from the front of my yacht every morning, "I'm rich, I'm rich." After getting the day started off right, I'd eat a plate of truffles. Then I would have one of those phone booths with the vacuum things in it and lots of $100 bills. The bills would fly around in the booth and I would catch them in my expensive silk money catching net and yell, "I'm still rich. I'm still rich." Then I'd have myself rubbed in gold infused oils and take a nap on a bed made of the hair of beautiful children. After my nap, I would do a little day trading on-line. And then play tennis against the Williams' sisters. They would always loose, as I would pay them to do so. A simple dinner would follow - just a half dozen cornish hens served inside of turkeys.
That's just me. What would you do, Roger?
Mason Lerner
Create an exact replica of a Soviet-style political retraining prison, kidnap Natalie Portman, throw her into it and just before she thought she was going to be executed, I would let her know that the whole thing was a farce. That way she would finally get her priorities straight. Or has that all ready been done? Either way, I hit the Power Ball and that bitch is gonna get her head right.
I would name Boris's beard Superman IV, The Quest for Peace.
Shirt me.