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The Heretic: Going Colorblind in a Jewish Nursing Home |
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 by Shmarya Rosenberg, September 4, 2008 |
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I caught early chunks of Obama’s acceptance speech at the gym of my local JCC. Not surprisingly, the crowd that night was heavily Republican, and there were mutterings of concern: Is Obama truly committed to Israel? Is Obama too soft on terror? Is he simply another pie-in-the-sky liberal, full of fancy talk, elaborate plans and much hot air?
No one was concerned about Obama’s skin color.
We’re less than 145 years removed from slavery and only 40 removed from legal segregation, and we may very well elect a black man as president. No matter your political affiliation, chances are you understand it was an historic moment for America.
I left part way through Obama’s speech and drove to a Jewish community nursing home to make a late visit. While the nursing home is affiliated with the Jewish community, most of its residents are not Jewish. In order to accept federal, state and local funds, nursing homes cannot discriminate based on religious affiliation, color, country of origin, sexual preference, or gender. Years ago, the Jewish community opted to take government funds, a decision that eventually turned the facility’s resident base into a pretty fair representation of the local population, rather than a spot on representation of the Jewish community.
With this change came good and bad. The good is diversity. The bad is Christmas trees, Christian prayer services, nuns in the hallways, and an atmosphere that at one point, before some modicum of balance was struck, had Jewish residents feeling like an oppressed minority in their own home. During the peak of this, even the facility’s rabbis felt beleaguered.
I asked one if she had anyone who could help a resident light electric Shabbat candles. With tears in her eyes told me, “There isn’t anyone. There’s nothing Jewish here.” Another had his facility-wide Purim decorations ripped down by staff and replaced with St. Patrick’s Day ornamentation when the two holidays coincided on the calendar.
Not too long ago, a new resident – an elderly black woman whom I’ll call Jennie – was admitted. Suffering from a form of dementia, she’s often overcome with fear. She hears noises in the hall and thinks neighborhood thugs are breaking in to try to kill her. She thinks everyone is conspiring against her and that her food is poisoned. She can be loud and disruptive, breaking into tears and sobbing or putting on her best street bravado to ward off enemies that are not there.
As much as I try not to let myself judge an elderly, demented person by her actions – and especially by their skin color or religion – there are times when I catch myself thinking about how disruptive, non-Jewish residents should go to non-Jewish facilities.
A few months ago, I had a moment like that with Jennie. She sat in a lounge area, alternately threatening to “pop” imaginary intruders and breaking into tears. I told myself what I always do in encounters like these: Reverse the situation. How would I judge it if the disruptive demented person were Jewish and the nursing facility was not? Would I think it’s okay for that facility to remove the sick, elderly, disruptive Jew because he’s Jewish? Of course not. So why should the reverse be any different?
I sat beside Jennie and calmed her down by asking about her youth. She told me that as a child, she had known freed slaves. She'd been born dirt poor and had faced intense discrimination. But she raised children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. And she had built a successful business.
After a while she asked, “Where are we now? What’s the name of this place?”
I told her. She looked at me, startled, and then looked around her. “I used to work here,” she said, “in the kitchen, along time ago. But it looks different.”
I told her this was a different building in a different neighborhood than before. Then she told me about her friend the kosher butcher, a Holocaust survivor from Poland, whose shop once stood nearby the old building. “I used to buy all my meat from him when I first got married,” she explained.
I said that I had owned that store years later, and the same butcher had been my landlord and friend.
A few nights later, I found Jennie wandering in a hallway without her wheelchair or her wandering alarm. I had her hold onto a railing so she wouldn’t fall and I called for help. Then I asked Jennie why she was up so late, wandering around alone. “I’m a poor black woman,” she said. “If I don’t get up and get out of this house and find me some money, I’ll never go to college.” I asked her what she wanted to major in. “I want to be an engineer,” she replied.
When I arrived at the nursing home on the night of Obama’s speech, all the residents were asleep except Jennie. It was the 40th anniversary of Martin Luther King, Jr.'s "I Have A Dream" speech, providentially coinciding with Obama’s. Obama’s speech had ended and a T.V. station was showing a documentary on the two. Jennie sat silent in her wheelchair in front of the TV, watching King and Obama. Gone were the disruptive behaviors, the paranoia, and the pain.
I stopped to say hello. King was on the screen.
“They shot him, didn't they?” she said.
“They did,” I told her.
She turned and looked at me. “And now a black man could be president?”
I said he very well could.
She turned back to the screen. “And now a black man could be president,” she said watching King. This time it wasn’t a question.
Barack Obama is not the Democratic nominee because of his skin color or despite it. He isn’t a token or a novelty. Barack Obama is the nominee because his was the strongest message and the best run campaign. This is the first time America has been truly colorblind.
I don't know if Barack Obama will win. He wasn’t my first choice among Democratic candidates – I’m not even sure who I’ll vote for come November. But there is one thing I am sure of: America is a better place because Barack Obama is the Democratic nominee.
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Ismail
"The bad is Christmas trees, Christian prayer services, nuns in the hallways..."
The morons who ripped down the Purim decorations should be hanged on Mordechai's gallows, for sure, but you're distressed about nuns in the hallway?
Intolerant much?
Shmarya Rosenberg
Give yourself dementia. Put yourself in a nursing home. Have the resident mix rapidly change from 98.5 % Jewish to 35% Jewish. Have nuns walking around in habits.
That might confuse you just a bit, don't you think?
Now make yourself a Ukrainian Holocaust survivor in that same situation.
Might it bring back a few bad memories?
WheresYr MessiahNow
The "mutterings of concern" about Obama among the heavily Republican crowd at the gym of your local JCC did not include mention of his "skin color."
Therefore "[n]o one was concerned about Obama’s skin color."
Huh?
How about, instead, "any racists among them knew not to express their racism publicly and in plain language"?
In a recent op-ed piece in the New York Times, someone cited a poll in which 19% of whites said that most people they knew wouldn't vote for a black person, but only 5% of whites said that they personally would not. This basically means that 19% - 5% = 14% of them were lying about themselves.
Because of this problem, and because of your incredibly small and unrepresentative sample, the JCC vignette doesn't provide any support for your conclusion that "this is the first time America has been truly colorblind." And I don't see that you've provided any other support for it.
As for the nursing-home story, what's the point? What's it have to do with the election? The problem, if one feels there is one, could be avoided by not taking government funds, as you say.
davidbruce
What's on my mind?
I'm no different than anybody else.
Don't we all fantasize about Obama in a bra and a really tight skirt?
No - wait.
That's my John McCain fantasy.
Jeff Eyges
I'm actually a little surprised by the nursing home demographics. Here in
Boston, the state of our Jewish philanthropies is a disgrace. I was
under the impression, however, that in New York, it's a different case
- more money, more comprehensive, more proactive, etc. I wouldn't have thought they'd need to resort to government funding, disenfranchising Jews in the process.
Shmarya Rosenberg
I'm in Minnesota.
Jeff Eyges
OH! Never mind!
Shmarya Rosenberg
>>>The "mutterings of concern" about Obama among the heavily Republican crowd at the gym of your local JCC did not include mention of his "skin color."
Therefore "[n]o one was concerned about Obama’s skin color."
Huh?
How about, instead, "any racists among them knew not to express their racism publicly and in plain language"?
In a recent op-ed piece in the New York Times, someone cited a poll in which 19% of whites said that most people they knew wouldn't vote for a black person, but only 5% of whites said that they personally would not. This basically means that 19% - 5% = 14% of them were lying about themselves.<<<
I mentioned the study in my first draft but pulled it due to space issues. I head about the study from several of those gym guys. Each one mentioned it with sadness.
Were there racists that night in the gym?
Who knows.
But the people I spoke with disliked Obama for his policies, for his liberalism – not for his skin color. No one even mentioned Rev. Wright, for example.
WoolSilkCotton
Every time Barack Obama's name is mentioned on failedmessiah.com, our fellow bloggers, hiding behind their pseudonyms, express a shocking degree of hatred toward the man, and it's more than just the partisan junk I would expect from an orthodox, and therefore Republican, crowd. There is palpable anti-black sentiment towards him from the religious Jewish crowd. Those folks aren't voting for any Democrat, but their ugly expressions are a cause for concern.
Black Hatter
It makes sense to be wary of the Blacks who are largely anti-Semitic.
Liberals will buy the rope to hang themselves with and ignore that Barack Obama's pastor is anti-American raving lunatic who hates all White folks.
Minnesotan
I frequent the JCC that Shamarya speaks of, and I would agree that the people there that aren't for him, aren't for him because of policy and not skin color.
I live in the Jewish community (across the river) that overwhelmingly supported a Black Muslim for congress over a White Jew. Why? Policy, not skin color (or religious affiliation).
Anonymous
Thanks Shmarya for this insitive and a bit romantic story
honestabe
while i am a fan of shmarya and his work i must disagree with regards to jewish racism...perhaps in MN it isnt so, but being raised in brooklyn NY the heart of orthodox judaism, blacks were always called niggers; at home, in yeshiva and on the streets...they were refered to in mocking tones and trivialized routinely...then again, what do u expect from a group of people who discriminate within their own small sect...even in contemporary modern ortho society a shidduch between ashkenazim and sphardim is frowned upon...shame on a group of people who half a cenutry ago survived the ovens to be such blatant racists and closed minded people!!!
Anonymous
Have you seen the John Hagee videos? Is this guilt by association the way to go? If you believe that the Christian Right has any use for the Jews beyond their help with the Rapture you have no understanding of their movement. And make no mistake, Sarah Palin was picked to offer red meat to that crowd.
Anonymous
Lately, the politically correct crowd and ignoramouses (my own word) are yelling "Racist" if any intelligent, pro-American or pro-Israel supporter admits that they will vote for the white guy. According to polls, put out by the almighty guide for the masses, 99.9% of all blacks will vote for Obama, come hell or highwater, but the Racist word is not mentioned. Has it ever occurred to anyone that "its not the color of the skin", or the party supported, its the actions, evidence of how a people treats its own, e.g. -brutality reigns in every African country ---well since the UK gave it back. Deny all you want, and if you have proof of any obvious benefits black leaders in African countries have bestowed upon their own, lets hear them. In the meantime, I'll take my chances, and my family's, on the white guy. Honest, looking after my survival if I have a choice. Racist? Have at it!