Tue, Oct 07, 2008

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Jewcy Book Club

Welcome Authors
Brian Frazer
&
Mike Edison
who are posting all week.
Coming up:
  • 10/13:
    Rabbi Levi Brackman and Sam Jaffe
  • 10/20:
    Jonathan Garfinkel
  • 10/20:
    Rabbi Robert Levine
  • 10/27:
    Danit Brown
  • 10/27:
    Joshua Henkin
  • 11/03:
    Craig Glazer
  • 11/10:
    Max Gross
  • 11/17:
    Seth Greenland

Pressure to settle

My dating in Toronto has led me to a question: Are Jewish men pressured to get married more in North America than the rest of the world? Or is it more an age thing than a religion thing?

Every Jewish guy I've met in the 6 months since I moved here has been on the fasttrack to marriage. I've had guys who've told their parents all about me before our first date; guys who've planned the next 6 months of our fledgling relationship after 2 dates and the latest, a guy who's talked marriage and engagement rings 4 dates in. I've had more flowers bought for me in the last 6 months than I received in all 27 years living in South Africa and Australia (that could say more about Southern Hemisphere men than anything else though!) and my commitment-phobic tendancies are out in full force.

In context: these guys have all been 28-32 years old. Most of their Jewish friends are married or engaged. I have to say that this pressure is not something I've felt before (other than from my mother who started relaxing after my brother settled down) and definitely not something I'm used to from the guys.

Any thoughts?


 

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