Are you a South Carolinian worried about illegal immigrants pouring over the border between Mexico and your fair state? (And why shouldn't you be? Hispanics are almost 3% of South Carolina's population!) Never fear: Help is on the way. Buddy Witherspoon, proven conservative Republican, is challenging liberal incumbent Senator Lindsey Graham.

Think calling Lindsey Graham a liberal makes absolutely no sense? Well, doubting Thomas, take a look at this: images of border crossings and people speaking Spanish. No one knows for sure what "trabajar" and "gracias, Lindsey Graham" mean, but it's probably some sort of terrorist plot -- superimposed on top of salsa music.

Are the stakes in this election clear now? Like Buddy says, it's time for a senator with South Carolina values.