Hostess Confidential: Antisemitism at Four O'Clock |
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by Isabelle Viegas, January 3, 2008 |
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If you caught the first installment of Hostess Confidential, you'll remember that I work at a well-known restaurant in Manhattan's Union Square. It's a fast-paced environment with demanding customers who have no use for wait-lists, which means I witness a lot of scandalous behavior. Bon Appetit.
It's 4:30. I’m standing at the host stand and I've been there for six hours. I'm on for another six and working "a dirty double," our industry's name for a double-shift. I haven't eaten a thing and I feel dizzy and nauseated. It's slow, and two bartenders from the restaurant next-door have been sitting at the bar for over an hour, and I swear, if I have to hear how "full" or "round" another wine is, I'm going to start dry-heaving.
Red Wine: Brings on Bad Behavior.
Their names are Frank and Eddie. Frank is a tall, waifish, blonde who is trapped in the eighties: he wears skinny pants, a skinny tie, and thick framed glasses. Eddie is scruffy and bearded and wears his suit with a smile.
Frank, on his fifth glass of wine says "So I met my girl's family during Hanukkah."
"Your girl is Jewish?" Eddie asks.
"Oh yeah, she comes from this big Jewish family. And it's Hanukkah so they've got this huge spread of food: roast beef, smoked salmon, matzo ball soup, roasted potatoes, two different desserts, I mean, there was so much food—Jews, they're such big eaters, it's disgusting. So, her grandma starts serving me, you know, big Jewish portions, and I've got to eat it, because grandmas are the matriarchs of Jewish families. So I’m buttering up grandma, you know, lots of nods and uh-huhs while she's talking because, old Jewish ladies don't know when to shut-up—"
"Right, bitches don't stop." Eddie says, rolling his eyes.
"So, now, Grandma loves me. It's smooth sailing from now on. I'm proposing to my girl next week." Frank says.
"Congratulations. Does that make you half-Jewish?" Eddie asks.
"Dude, I will NEVER be Jewish." Frank says.
Say Anything: Except at a bar.
Finally Frank had said something that I agreed with. He will never be Jewish. His antisemitism and chauvinism were grating on me and what I found even more grating was knowing that I would have to deal with Frank, and others like him, again.
Frank, like many, think that anything goes at the bar. They believe they that have the right to say or do anything because they are paying for their drinks. What they don't understand is, they don't pay people like me, people who work there, enough to listen to their racism and bigotry. In fact no amount of money could pay for this. Furthermore, when we tell our managers that a customer is being obnoxious, we have to continue working and serving them. And, at the end of the day, we are the ones that have to leave the restaurant with a foul taste in our mouths.
I wanted to say something to Frank, but Jose, my manager, came over to me and said, "It's time for you to go on your break. I'll watch the door."
Relieved that I was finally going to get something to eat and leave Frank behind, I gathered my coat and purse and braved the New York winter. Walking outside, I was left with one thought: Think about what you say at the bar. Others are listening.
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Isabelle Viegas recently graduated from the school of hard knocks. She considers herself a cook, a writer, and a hostess. She loves Mexican, Spanish, and spicy food--bring on the chilies, wasabi, and curries, please. She enjoys drinking her whiskey straight More... |
Adam Shprintzen
Anyone who would use the phrase "my girl" is probably dripping with douchiness anyway...
Avigail
Well, my Bubbe, beloved matriarch and gifted Jewish chef, would like to kick both of their asses. You did get a name from the credit card slip, didn't you? Maybe a helpful phone call to the prospective fiancee?
anti-intermarriage
If the girlfriend's family were really proud Jews they would object to her Goy boyfriend. Of course he will never be Jewish, thank God, and their kids probably won't either. There are many latent anti-semites who marry Jews just like this jerk.
Unfortunately there are many Jews who worship Gentiles and are so thrilled when the "superior Goys" choose them. Intermarriage is all about self-hatred. A Proud Jew would never marry a Gentile.
h.
i don't know...something about those two guys screams 'douchebag' to me.
and no offense to anti-intermarriage, but you post the same thing over and over again. if you focused on the positives of the Jewish community as opposed to the negatives, chances are more Jews would in-marry than not.
Barbara Reader
Still more common to be a Jewish man and a non-Jewish girl, than
what you witnessesed here. And the children, according to
Orthodoxy and Conservatism, are Jewish, whatever the couple agree.
And
I'm betting he will follow the standard American Male route and let the
wife control religion. So keep an eye out for these two.
FYI,
I have a nonobvious name, blue eyes, a medium non-hooked nose (smaller
than Princess Diana's), non-curly light brown ('dirty blonde') hair,
light skin, and extensive experience being picked up by Jewish men who
are looking for non-Jewish women. On no less than five occassions
have I been wooed and flattered by Jewish men who mistook me for a
non-Jew (three picked me up at Jewish events, you'd think they'd at
least ask) and ditched me within less than 60 seconds in the middle of
dates when they discovered their mistakes. The hunt to intermarry
definately exists. "I just happened to fall in love with a
gentile girl..." was a line all five were already saying on their dates
with me before I let them know they weren't falling in love with a
gentile girl and got instantly dumped. Intermarriage IS
antisemetic, and I'm not talking about the non-Jew in the intermarriage.
I
don't know how non-Jewish men think about it, but I've met born-gentile
women (and you can make your own judgements about their conversions)
who converted because they confided in me (also assuming me a fellow
person not born Jewish) that they converted to get a rich husband, and
intended to raise their kids as Christians once they had their wedding
rings and no pre-nup forbidding it. "What if you meet a rich
Christian boy?" "I just won't tell him I converted to Judaism."
FYI,
Reader is an Austrian name, and most people who spell it as I do are
Jews. I have met a few dozen people with my last name who spell
it like me, and only one wasn't Jewish. He was African-American,
and his ancestor had adopted it to celebrate learning to read after
being freed from slavery.
There is a strong sense among certain
Jews that the lowest-class non-Jew outranks the highest-class
Jew. I would like to say these people are antisemetic, and yes, I
also think Blacks can be racists. Since some of these people only
believe members of the opposite sex are inferior, while members of
their own are superior, this is not necessarily 'self-hatred.'
Ha'Troll
Everything the guy said is true, though he phrased it all offensively. He won't ever be Jewish. Grandmothers are the matriarchs in Jewish families, and Jews do serve larger portions than Gentiles -- because our food is worth eating. Old Jewish women really don't know when to shut the fuck up.
"Unfortunately there are many Jews who worship Gentiles and are so thrilled when the "superior Goys" choose them. Intermarriage is all about self-hatred. A Proud Jew would never marry a Gentile."
Shut the fuck up. I'm going to explain intermarriage very simply for you. Especially the bit about, "Still more common to be a Jewish man and a non-Jewish girl, than what you witnessesed here."
You know what the secret is? JEWISH WOMEN IN AMERICA ARE OVERWEIGHT, INBRED, BITCHES, OR ALL THREE AT THE SAME TIME. This is not an artifact of being Jewish; it's an artifact of smugly thinking that some American Jewish man somewhere HAS to marry them, and that they therefore don't need to take care of themselves the way Gentile girls do. Israeli Jewish girls, despite the nasty jokes and rumors perpetrated by self-hating Jews, are quite desirable on the first two fronts, and become just fine on the last once you get past the basic Israeli-ness of their attitudes.
So you want to know what you can do to reduce intermarriage in this country?
1) Jewish girls: lose weight. Seriously. We don't HAVE to marry you any more, so damn well make yourselves attractive. My own mother once walked into a Jewish summer camp to pick me up and wondered why all the girls were so fat.
2) Interbreed Jews. Men can help with this, too. American Jewry is 80% Ashkenazi, which causes unattractive and sometimes even unhealthy degrees of inbreeding. Marriage between Ashkenazim, Sfardim and Mizrachim (not at the same time) produces healthier and more attractive children.
3) Drop the attitude, Jewish women. It only pushes us Jewish guys right into the arms of that beautiful blonde shiksa. And Jewish guys? Stop trying to act like douchebag WASP men. You just weren't raised in the right environment of leisurely, stuck-up alcoholism to pull it off.
Barbara Reader
Lying bigot that you are. OR maybe, you are just a disgusting troll, like you said.
If it's that we are overweight bitches, why did those guys think
I was a beautiful gentile and desirable for up to two dates until they
found out I was Jewish? Why did they walk away immediately when
they found out? Suddenly my weight went up thirty pounds in
ten seconds? Nice theory. I think the only Bitchiness was
that they would have licked my behind if I were a gentile, and the fact
that I was a Jewess transformed me magically into a bitch because they,
like you, are bigots.
You hate Jewish woman. YOU would
marry an ugly angry scheming fat gentile before a pretty and nice
Jewish girl. Perhaps you already have, and you are pissed about
having to take down your Christmas lights. You don't want to kick
the ass of your precious gentile wife, so you came here to kick
ours. And Jewish guys have been marrying non-Jewish women since
the 19th century...nothing new about it "Now we don't have to."
As long as men have money, they can buy a women. The Solomon
Brothers did it in the early 1800s. So did the Rothschilds.
It's all about the your money, not your superiority.
Jewish
women on average are LESS overweight than gentile women. Your
information is in violation of statistical averages by scientific
studies. If you think Jewish women are ugly, that's your
expression of what you like, but it's not based on weight. And by
the way, Jewish men now drink as much or more than WASP men.
AGAIN, read the studies. I've spent a lot of time among White
Protestants (I fit in, except religously, quite comfortably; my family
has been in the country for a long time.) and not all of them drink,
just as not all Jews drink. The statistical difference of the
1930s is history. And unlike you, a lot of them have noticed that
a lot of Jewish women take very good care of themselves... apparently,
the fellow in the original posting in this thread noticed. The
difference in intermarriage rates is not due to a difference in
opportunity, but rather the hatred of women innate to the Jewish male
bonding experience, which you have, apparently, been a very actively
part of. Other non-Jewish men complain about 'women.' ... but not
specifically their own women. They are not hate-filled bigots
like you.
BUT thank you for demonstrating my point,
namely, that Jewish men hate Jewish women and feel superior about it.
I just hope nobody thinks I made up your post. It's such a
wonderful illustration of my central point.
Ha'Troll
She got burned by a couple of self-hating Jewish men and now wants to take it out on me. Go ahead. I'm a troll, after all, it's what I'm here for.
"If it's that we are overweight bitches, why did those guys think I was a beautiful gentile and desirable for up to two dates until they found out I was Jewish? Why did they walk away immediately when they found out?"
Because they're self-hating Jews, doofus. You got burned, it happens, get over it.
"You hate Jewish woman. YOU would marry an ugly angry scheming fat gentile before a pretty and nice Jewish girl. Perhaps you already have, and you are pissed about having to take down your Christmas lights. You don't want to kick the ass of your precious gentile wife, so you came here to kick ours."
Oh, sorry. Married to one of the rare Jewish women who DOES take care of herself (luckily my computer desk is in the living room down the hall from our bedroom, so she won't wake up). Turkish too, and absolutely beautiful on both counts. In fact, if you dare insult my wife again I shall have to find you and hurt you.
"Jewish women on average are LESS overweight than gentile women. Your information is in violation of statistical averages by scientific studies."
I'll let Sheila Brofloski of "South Park" do my talking here: "Wha, WHA, WHAAT!?" Cite your damned sources.
"If you think Jewish women are ugly, that's your expression of what you like, but it's not based on weight."
I'm sorry, but even my wife shakes her head at what some of my Jewish friends are dating in their efforts to go with Jewish girls. It's not healthy what too many Jewish women do to themselves!
"And by the way, Jewish men now drink as much or more than WASP men. AGAIN, read the studies. I've spent a lot of time among White Protestants (I fit in, except religously, quite comfortably; my family has been in the country for a long time.) and not all of them drink, just as not all Jews drink."
You see, what I said about drinking behavior in Jewish men was a condemnation. Guzzling down Budweisers isn't becoming of a proper Jewish man. The Gentiles can make up their own rules, but Jewish men are supposed to keep our wits and maturity about us.
"And unlike you, a lot of them have noticed that a lot of Jewish women take very good care of themselves... apparently, the fellow in the original posting in this thread noticed."
Or maybe he likes chubby women. Some men do.
"The difference in intermarriage rates is not due to a difference in opportunity, but rather the hatred of women innate to the Jewish male bonding experience, which you have, apparently, been a very actively part of. Other non-Jewish men complain about 'women.' ... but not specifically their own women. They are not hate-filled bigots like you."
Ah, the net hath no sexist like a woman scorned. And an Americanojudeo-centric woman at that, who apparently believes that American Jewish women constitute the entire set of "Jewish women" when in fact they are a significant minority. You just keep telling yourself that a collective hatred of Jewish females by Jewish males is the reason you're still single. After all, unless you do some pretty serious stalking it can't ruin MY marriage.
"BUT thank you for demonstrating my point, namely, that Jewish men hate Jewish women and feel superior about it. I just hope nobody thinks I made up your post. It's such a wonderful illustration of my central point."
We don't hate Jewish women. We hate the way you ruin yourselves and then cop an attitude about it. I guess I just got lucky to find an intelligent, pretty Jewish woman who doesn't need bitchiness, anger, or professions of victimhood to assert herself. God save me if I ever cross her, though it would please my mother, who didn't like giving cooking lessons (we had to compromise, since my wife doesn't like some of my more American dishes and I only like some of her Turkish ones).
Good night. Can't like the missus roll over into my spot in bed.
Isabelle Viegas
Standing at the hostess stand that afternoon, listening to Frank, I was sickened by his bigotry, sense of superiority over women and Jews, and his general sense of entitlement. His attitude, his hatred, and his own insecurities were appalling to me. While I certainly hope he does not marry this girl, I don't think that intermarriage is a problem as long as both parties mutually respect and attempt to try to understand each other's cultures and separate histories.
I am a product of intermarriage. My mother is Mexican and my father is a white American. After my Dad married my mom, he became culturally sensitive to the prejudices that my mother faced daily, and he did his best to combat them. My mother has an accent, and because of it has been significantly underpaid in the work force. Her employers expect her to be submissive and pretend that her English is the reason that she cannot get a raise. My mother has very good English, she is entirely intelligible, she is smart, capable, and friendly. And yet, she has often been discriminated against. My father has never condescended to my mother and has often told her to leave bad jobs, move on, and find something better. He has been her rock. I think that my parents are a good example of intermarriage, and as I said before, when intermarrying, I think that respect, love, and cultural sensitivity are needed.
anti-intermarriage
Just another Hitler-worshipping piece of shit! I'm not American and I've met tons of beautiful American Jewish women. You're just another Nazi who portrays themselves as Jewish so you can make anti-semitic comments. If I ever met you I would beat you to a pulp. I've beaten up Nazis before and I would do it again.
Barbara is right when she writes that most anti-intermarriage stems from anti-semitism. Many American secualr Jewish men are self-hating Gentiles worshippers. When they do marry their shiksas, most are not even attractive, they only have "Jewish" ceremonies to please their parents and the rich Jewish organizations they belong to. Conversion for marriage is the biggest sham going on in Judiasm. These shiksas don't care at all about Judiasm or Jews. They just want a rich Jewish man so they can be set for life and it's also very trendy to marry a Jew nowadays.
Why do many American Jewish men think that Aryan shiksas are beautiful? Most of them are not. It's all about worshipping the Goys and wanting Gentile children. It's funny that American Jewish men judge Jewish women looks when many are ugly and wimpy. Forget them and go for the handsome foreign Jewish men who love Jewish women.
Intermarriage is a problem for the Jewish people. It's affecting our population and is all facets of Judiasm. I'm tired of meeting people who call themselves Jews and celebrate Christmas. That is not being a real Jew!
Barbara Reader
I always appreciate it when somebody defends me.
Anti-intermarriage, consider signing up as a member at this website.