...for this story. I am doing a lot of reading lately preparing for my conversion to Judaism and your story mirrors a lot of thought in, American Judaism: A History, by Jonathan D. Sarna. In the beginning of the book he asks if a book on American Judaism is relevant or needed. Most of the answers follow this line of thinking "Jews came to America, lost their faith, The End". Your questions and curiosities as a Bar Mitzvah coincide with most of Jewish America's search for faith and continuation of custom.