Tamar, it is interesting that regarding your "friend" the porn star, you suggest that such impulses are disgusting and degrading and have a bad social impact while regarding homosexual impulses--all is fine and there is nothing wrong with it.  Would you care to explain such a contradiction?

The position of the Yeshiva makes perfect sense.  An alumnus who is homosexual should not be banned and the person at issue is allowed to come--to invite his homosexual partner would suggest that his union is acceptable and this cannot be allowed.  This is a common blind spot found on this blog time and again.  The fact that we all fall short of the standard does not condemn us--what will condemn us is if we rally against the standard.  Ergo, where we fall short of the law, it is best not to advertise and take pride in the fact and it is offensive to  lobby against the law.  For the Yeshiva (and for all fair-minded Jews who are instructed to not judge people, only actions), the actions of an alum are separate from the legitimacy of the person himself.

We all must contain our sexual impulses. Gay marriage is a very divisive issue and this is why it is much more problematic than other violations of the law.  Judaism's opposition to homosexuality is extensive and legendary and homosexuality is also a prohibition set forward in the Noahide laws.

Secular liberalism is supposedly "inclusive" but this is actually quite a deceit.  The kind of ethics displayed on this blog rarely hold a live and let live attitude and instead, there is a very harsh critique of Torah Judaism.  Live and let live is a calling card of religion and our American culture is quite happy to give homosexuals virtually the same freedoms as all other Americans, except rights which pertain to married couples as couples.  Jews have quite a lot to say about marriage, its value and its sanctity--to suggest that a Yeshiva should be silent about a sensation created on its own premises strains credulity.

Given your background, it is quite a surprise you might expect a different reaction.